I am a Bastard

[autobodyboxcar]

I guess this is the place to post. I'm looking for my father. From what I can gather he met my mother at a Molly Hatchet concert. Supposedly he died in a train explosion. He had long hair and talked funny. Not ha-ha funny..I guess he talked fucked up , stupid funny shit like "Hey y'all! Watch me fuck this passed out chick and make her pregnant!"

I do not find that shit amusing at all. If one of y'all is my father we're going to rumble. Seriously. Fuck you dad.

 

[CorsetKat]

Is your name Sue?

If so, how do you do?

I'm gonna kill you.

 

[Iggy McLulz]

I bet Jack is your father. He dumped his other bastard Jibbles off here a few days ago.

 

[autobodyboxcar]

What the bloody hell is a jibble? If they're my siblings and that was a derogatory dig at my brothers and sisters we're going to have to throw down.

This is the bastard factory is it not? I'm a bastard whose mother was knocked up by a nameless, faceless Molly Hatchet fan. It's been a rough life. I grew up only wearing underwear to school and no one liked me because I had no pants.

I'm just looking for my father and y'all are mocking me? How many of you are bastards in this factory?

 

[Iggy McLulz]

@Jibbles < that is a jibbles. Not mocking, it's not my fault you father gave him a ridiculous name. There are a few bastards here. I'm not a bastard though, I'm an orphan. I'm sorry about your pants.

 

[offwidthe]

I am a bastard. Be proud of who you are.

 

[Gyroscope]

Maybe Molly Hatchet is your dad.

 

[Oerdin]

I guess this is the place to post. I'm looking for my father. From what I can gather he met my mother at a Molly Hatchet concert. Supposedly he died in a train explosion. He had long hair and talked funny. Not ha-ha funny..I guess he talked fucked up , stupid funny shit like "Hey y'all! Watch me fuck this passed out chick and make her pregnant!"

I do not find that shit amusing at all. If one of y'all is my father we're going to rumble. Seriously. Fuck you dad.

99% chance this was a troll bit of there is a 1% chance it is true then your best bet is something like Ancestry DNA.