The Warmest Story You'll Ever Read from Me

SirSuperSouthern

It's always 5:55, bitch
Joined
Mar 31, 2019
Location
meltdown
Go to gramma's every summer when I'm young so my folks could furiously fuck every night. Whatever. My gramma's cooking was so great that we rarely went out to eat, and when we did the food all seemed plastic.

Anyway, one time a large table left, leaving a lot of food on the table - leftovers, whatever. My gramma urgently motions to our beer bitch to bag all the grub behind us and give it to her because she "has friends". The embarrassment was what I assumed would be legendary.

Two days later we head down to the bottom of AZ to a town that isn't really anything anywhere. So here's what happened.

Gramma and I walk down a dirt road with fucked up fences, peeling paint (blame the Sun), and a particularly vicious pack of wild dogs that NOBODY would walk past. You know how it goes when a dog barks at you from behind a fence; then you smile, wave, and keep walking. These animals were all about knee high or taller and all had huge clots of missing hair, missing teeth, missing legs, etc. There was like 7. I was fucking terrified.

Gramma has no fear. Her brothers were all killed in WW2, her husband grandpa was shot three times in Korea. All pussies compared to my gramma.

Once those grotesque beasts caught gramma's scent, they all started wagging, yipping, and pissing themselves at the sight/smell of her unshakable boldness. She reaches into an Applebee's bag after petting them all, hugging a few. She throws them all the food and extra she brought. You should've seen it. My throat becomes a bit tight every time I think about that humbling day.

That fat spic came out, saw gramma, saw the look she gave him, and immediately closed the door and possibly hid under his smelly old taco'd bed. This was the answer to why she always picked up ugly mentally unstable mutts on their way to electric doggie chairs. They started off as totally spastic because they didn't know where they were or who the fuck kept being overly nice to them - unlike the woman is with people - and BOOM!, as a kid I got to play with them all (up to 5 once) without worry because my grandmother made of unbreakable stone happy-tamed them all pretty quick, even those poor pooches who'd suffered terrible treatment until they hopped in the granny-mobile...




SSS
- she's still alive at 92 and everyone but me and her dog Joy hate her. I love her more than anyone, or anything and go to Tucson visit her soon
 

nazzibastard

Factory Bastard
Site Supporter
Joined
Jan 17, 2020
Location
sydney
who is this mmmmmm i think i no who is lol
 

realgrimm

Human Relations
Super Moderator
Joined
May 22, 2018
Location
outta here
She sounds like a great ol lady I to pic strays and rescues and have helped house lots from stealing them from junkies and dealers,we have issues around with dog fighting people kidnap pooches and use them as bait dogs so Ill even stand by dogs outside stores till their owners come back..

Cheers to gramma
 

Blazor

Factory Bastard
Site Supporter
Joined
Jun 5, 2018
Damn it, hell yeah. Go granma. I say cheers as well. I too help the poor homeless animals. Poor things. Your grandma reminds me of my great aunt too, love her to death. Will be a sad day when she gone. Im drunk as fuck, but I toast to your grandma SSS!
 

SirSuperSouthern

It's always 5:55, bitch
Joined
Mar 31, 2019
Location
meltdown
I release upon thee my dogs of WAR!





1) Hello

2) Th'up

3) Well, you se/

4) You're using up my mic time that I should have used to get my sagging top-fro from looking like my conditioner isn't worth its price or the impracticality of having to go buy it from Helzberg Diamonds...

5) RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!




SSS
- the fight in the dog is an unknown data until fate finds it out for you
 

The Countess

Factory Bastard
Joined
Jun 28, 2019
SSS loves him some spics, baby
 

nazzibastard

Factory Bastard
Site Supporter
Joined
Jan 17, 2020
Location
sydney
hi queeni lol
 
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