Thinking about animals who panick when they see the bedroom door close.....this is Edgar. My step dog. My big baby doggie.
Eddie loves things like ringing the bell to go outside as soon as you step into the shower, eating sticks of butter that are left on the counter (Prudence now will knock them down for him. They work together.....the little shits), he loves taking the same shit in at least 4 different spots in the yard. He will do this thing I call "goat toothing" where he will bite your tit meat with his weird front teeth. He wants nothing more than to shove his whole face into the cats asshole any and every chance he gets. And she is starting to just let out a defeated sigh when he does it.
If you sit on the floor for too long, Eddie WILL mount you and vigorously hump the air around your body. He won't touch his penis to you....but he will do the motions. And don't expect my boyfriend to save you. Oh no. He will yell "Fuck yeah you're getting a DICKIN!!!....musta smelled like BITCH in here!!" ......which is gonna make you laugh, and the laughing is gonna make the humping worse.
He takes my bras out of the dirty clothes hamper and runs with them through the whole house and throws them all over.
....he will bark, scream(did you know dogs scream?) and bash into the bedroom door the entire time you are....occupied.
When he is allowed entry into the bedroom, even though the bed is a CA king custom made with extra inches longwise.....he HAS to lay right on top of us. And he kicks out SO much body heat.
We have been working on Eddie's jealousy. He has been a single man's dog his whole life. My boyfriend belonged to Eddie dammit...and I'm an interloper lol. It's gotten much better. He doesn't try to push between us much anymore but he will still lay across my BF when he feels a bit insecure.
He is my big baby though and he is ALWAYS where I am. Right now.....daddy is sleeping and Eddie is out here by me. LOVE him.
I've never had dogs, so we are learning together.
The pathological humping really mellowed out A LOT. We stopped sitting on the floor and Eddie has settled down a lot and adjusted to all the new "pack" members.
Did I mention that he is terrified of the rabbit?