Who?

Who Are Your Two Champions?

  • No One

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Reggie_Essent

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Flynn

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • ESAD TIA

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • X

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • The Prowler

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Seamajor

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Bastard Factory

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Joe

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • The Question

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Kirk

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Realgrimm

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Admin

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • LotusBud

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Larry Loungelizard

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Master Pu

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • SirSuperSouthern

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Martini

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Caskur's Dentures

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • CW's Hard Drive

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Lemon's Underwear

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Breakfall's Moms Cancer X-Rays

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Biggie Smiles

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Dove

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Blurt

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Peaches' Nose

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Johnny Storm's Arby's Uniform

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Murdy's Cock

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Flynn's Tampon

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • X's Hepatitis C through Z

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    8

Flynn

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The day was dark, there was rain, you sipped your jet black coffee; and logged onto Bastard Factory forums. You suddenly feel a spark of electricity course through your body. There was only blackness. Then came a glimmer of light. Then the brightness subsided and you are surrounded by the cast of Bastard Factory forums. They're all staring at you.

Suddenly out of the crowd a lanky arm pulls you to your feet, and you're staring into the face of what looks like a primitive "stooch." Bewildered, you look upon this pathetic creature with pity. He opens up his toothless mouth and a cascade of broken piano sounding keys fly out in a language you barely understand.

The hunchback introduces himself as Cookie Monster. As you try to to stifle your laughter, his brow furrows, and where there used to be eyebrows are faux brows made by caked dust. He explains to you that the 13th removed cousin of Kim Jong Un II aka DKG has amassed an army of scary, inbred, and, illiterate mutants known as TBC Nerds who are about to overrun the defenses of BF. The Cookie monster further explains that it was foretold by Bastard Factory's butthole that a savior YOU would come and pick out 2 BF champions and quell the invasion once and for all.

Who who you want on your team of three? You can only pick 2 people not including yourself to fight your way out of the Bastard Factory multiverse and to save it. Remember, the posters have the same powers as they do on BF.

Please give a reason for your choice/s. Any vote with no explanation will not be counted. The top two vote getters will be included in the conclusion of this short story.
 
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Flynn

Flynn

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For me I would pick The Cuntess and Fredricka.

Why?

The Cuntess is like this street wise Barrio chick, that can shoot guns, load guns, and make lunch at the same time.

As for Fredricka, I chose her because she has the gift of gab, she can distract the enemy while me and The Cuntess ambush them from behind in a strictly kill them war kind of way.
 

Frood

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But Fred and Flea are females... you'll only ever be a distant stepbrother to them.... with horribly effeminate toes.
 
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Flynn

Flynn

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Really @Frood ?

You voted for yourself and couldn't be arsed to even put down a generic reason? Can you not read? Votes must be accompanied by your reason/s. You have two votes about to be nullified because of your silliness.
 

Kirk

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The day was dark, there was rain, you sipped your jet black coffee; and logged onto Bastard Factory forums. You suddenly feel a spark of electricity course through your body. There was only blackness. Then came a glimmer of light. Then the brightness subsided and you are surrounded by the cast of Bastard Factory forums. They're all staring at you.

Suddenly out of the crowd a lanky arm pulls you to your feet, and you're staring into the face of what looks like a primitive "stooch." Bewildered, you look upon this pathetic creature with pity. He opens up his toothless mouth and a cascade of broken piano sounding keys fly out in a language you barely understand.

The hunchback introduces himself as Cookie Monster. As you try to to stifle your laughter, his brow furrows, and where there used to be eyebrows are faux brows made by caked dust. He explains to you that the 13th removed cousin of Kim Jong Un II aka DKG has amassed an army of scary, inbred, and, illiterate mutants known as TBC Nerds who are about to overrun the defenses of BF. The Cookie monster further explains that it was foretold by Bastard Factory's butthole that a savior YOU would come and pick out 2 BF champions and quell the invasion once and for all.

Who who you want on your team of three? You can only pick 2 people not including yourself to fight your way out of the Bastard Factory multiverse and to save it. Remember, the posters have the same powers as they do on BF.

Please give a reason for your choice/s. Any vote with no explanation will not be counted. The top two vote getters will be included in the conclusion of this short story.

A corn dog and a Fractal.
 

Frood

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Really @Frood ?

You voted for yourself and couldn't be arsed to even put down a generic reason? Can you not read? Votes must be accompanied by your reason/s. You have two votes about to be nullified because of your silliness.

My non summary is a defiant repudiation of the debauchery of popularity contests at phpbb and ubb messages boards by an aging population.

We got to fight da powas dat bee!
 
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OP
Flynn

Flynn

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My non summary is a defiant repudiation of the debauchery of popularity contests at phpbb and ubb messages boards by an aging population.

We got to fight da powas dat bee!

Now these are popularity contests?

I would think that the person behind these polls would be the least shallow. Incidently, have you looked to see how you yourself voted in the other "popularity contests?"

Did I mention you have voted for yourself in most if not all of these "popularity contests?"
 
Last edited:

X

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For me I would pick The Cuntess and Fredricka.

Why?

The Cuntess is like this street wise Barrio chick, that can shoot guns, load guns, and make lunch at the same time.

As for Fredricka, I chose her because she has the gift of gab, she can distract the enemy while me and The Cuntess ambush them from behind in a strictly kill them war kind of way.
Cuntess couldn’t be street, she once ratted on me, in my hood that’d get her ventilated
 
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Flynn

Flynn

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Cuntess couldn’t be street, she once ratted on me, in my hood that’d get her ventilated

Dooo whaaaaa?

See, you are lying. How come this is the first I'm reading about this?

Hmmmmm?
 

X

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It’s these subtleties you must pay attention too if you’re to pick a team that’d have your back in the heat of battle
 
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Flynn

Flynn

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She outted my ALT, tho people knew already

See, that's not how you tell a story. It's no wonder you've been found guilty in a court of law over 3 times while representing yourself in court proceedings.

So because The Cuntess is just a giant bitch, she was just grazing the pasture, and decided that she would out your other alt known as admin for no good reason?
 

Frood

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Now these are popularity contests?

I would think that the person behind these polls would be the least shallow. Incidently, have you looked to see how you yourself voted in the other "popularity contests?"

Did I mention you have voted for yourself in most if not all of these "popularity contests?"

I generally vote for 90-95% of the field. :LOL3:
 

Frood

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Uh huh, and now who's making it a popularity vote by doing that?


I'd say my methods are more in keeping with an unpopularity vote... :Happy5:

"EVERYBODY except him and her and that fuckwit and that fuckwit!" Lol
 
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Flynn

Flynn

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I'd say my methods are more in keeping with an unpopularity vote... :Happy5:

"EVERYBODY except him and her and that fuckwit and that fuckwit!" Lol

And if you were really trying to even out the playing field, you would have voted for every single poster listed...but you didnt.