San Antonio to be renamed Tonyville. Make America American Again!

[Admin.]

BREAKING: San Antonio to Be Renamed “Tonyville” in Effort to Scrub Spanish from Texas Map
“If the name starts with ‘San,’ it ends with communism,” says spokesperson for Texans United for Naming Towns Sensibly (TUNTS).

The great Texas renaming crusade is officially underway, and first on the chopping block: San Antonio, which will soon be known as Tonyville — because, quote, “we like saints, but only if they sound like they own a Bass Pro Shop.”

Backed by hardline linguistic purity groups like:
• Christians for Anglo Cartography (CAC)
• Freedom Fried PAC
• and Texans Opposed to Romantic Languages (TORL),
this campaign is calling Spanish place names “a threat to the moral fiber of directional signage.”

Additional proposed rebrands include:
• Corpus Christi → Jesus Beach
• El Paso → Y’all Paso
• Del Rio → Real River, TX
• Laredo → Freedom Junction
• Llano → Flat Jack
• Los Fresnos → Them Trees
• San Marcos → Marksville
• Las Colinas → The Hills (But Proud)

A TUNTS press release stated:

“Texas place names should reflect our values: clarity, patriotism, and the God-given right to mispronounce queso.”

The Rio Grande may also be renamed River USA and a petition is circulating to exile the ñ from keyboards statewide.

Historians, geographers, and Spanish teachers are calling it “deeply unserious,” but supporters say they won’t rest “until every map in Texas reads like a Bass Pro gift registry.”

Coming soon:
The Great Tex-Mex Rebranding — because apparently nachos are suspicious now too.

 

[Joe]

The Rio Grande may also be renamed River USA and a petition is circulating to exile the ñ from keyboards statewide.

'Big River' lol

 

[Lily]

BREAKING: San Antonio to Be Renamed “Tonyville” in Effort to Scrub Spanish from Texas Map
“If the name starts with ‘San,’ it ends with communism,” says spokesperson for Texans United for Naming Towns Sensibly (TUNTS).

The great Texas renaming crusade is officially underway, and first on the chopping block: San Antonio, which will soon be known as Tonyville — because, quote, “we like saints, but only if they sound like they own a Bass Pro Shop.”

Backed by hardline linguistic purity groups like:
• Christians for Anglo Cartography (CAC)
• Freedom Fried PAC
• and Texans Opposed to Romantic Languages (TORL),
this campaign is calling Spanish place names “a threat to the moral fiber of directional signage.”

Additional proposed rebrands include:
• Corpus Christi → Jesus Beach
• El Paso → Y’all Paso
• Del Rio → Real River, TX
• Laredo → Freedom Junction
• Llano → Flat Jack
• Los Fresnos → Them Trees
• San Marcos → Marksville
• Las Colinas → The Hills (But Proud)

A TUNTS press release stated:

“Texas place names should reflect our values: clarity, patriotism, and the God-given right to mispronounce queso.”

The Rio Grande may also be renamed River USA and a petition is circulating to exile the ñ from keyboards statewide.

Historians, geographers, and Spanish teachers are calling it “deeply unserious,” but supporters say they won’t rest “until every map in Texas reads like a Bass Pro gift registry.”

Coming soon:
The Great Tex-Mex Rebranding — because apparently nachos are suspicious now too.

That's from "The Onion", right?

 

[Admin.]

That's from "The Onion", right?

Babylon Bee actually

 

[Larry Loungelizard]

That's from "The Onion", right?

My primary news source.

 

[Lily]

Babylon Bee actually

Texas does have some problems with the Spanish names though...

There is a town/city in Texas called Refugio (Refuge) and it is pronounced Reh Foo He O.

The white peoples pronounce it Reh Foo Ree O...my partner admitted trying to find it on a map when he was a youngster and being completely lost until he asked his parents how it was spelled.

Amarillo is pronounced Ah ma rio (as in Rio de Janeiro, rio)

They pronounce is Am a Ril lo, or worse yet Am a Ril ah.

 

[Courier 6]

Yo queero oon tack-o eeee kwessuh-dilluh, poor fayver!

 

[Admin.]

Texas does have some problems with the Spanish names though...

There is a town/city in Texas called Refugio (Refuge) and it is pronounced Reh Foo He O.

The white peoples pronounce it Reh Foo Ree O...my partner admitted trying to find it on a map when he was a youngster and being completely lost until he asked his parents how it was spelled.

Amarillo is pronounced Ah ma rio (as in Rio de Janeiro, rio)

They pronounce is Am a Ril lo, or worse yet Am a Ril ah.

I blame Jerry Jeff Walker



I and a few Navy buddies drunkenly sang this song on the banks of the Mississippi River outside Memphis back in the day.

 

[Lily]

I blame Jerry Jeff Walker

He's the reason "English" speakers in Texas pronounce a G like an R?

Damn him! Couldn't he at least get any kind of g sound out of them?

 

[LotusBud]

Texas does have some problems with the Spanish names though...

There is a town/city in Texas called Refugio (Refuge) and it is pronounced Reh Foo He O.

The white peoples pronounce it Reh Foo Ree O...my partner admitted trying to find it on a map when he was a youngster and being completely lost until he asked his parents how it was spelled.

Amarillo is pronounced Ah ma rio (as in Rio de Janeiro, rio)

They pronounce is Am a Ril lo, or worse yet Am a Ril ah.

They do the same shit with a lot of place names in California. Especially street names in LA. I can't think of any right now, it's been so long.

Oh, yeah. Like Los Feliz. That's Las Feeluz. And I'm pretty sure they called Arguello Blvd in San Francisco, Arguelo instead of of Arg-way-oh.

 

[Lily]

They do the same shit with a lot of place names in California. Especially street names in LA. I can't think of any right now, it's been so long.

Oh, yeah. Like Los Feliz. That's Las Feeluz. And I'm pretty sure they called Arguello Blvd in San Francisco, Arguelo instead of of Arg-way-oh.

Yes, Los Baños, Los Bannows...

Manteca is called Manteeka, though that might be better than Manteca is that specific instance. But an R for a G...that's Texas special.

 

[LotusBud]

Yes, Los Baños, Los Bannows...

Manteca is called Manteeka, though that might be better than Manteca is that specific instance. But an R for a G...that's Texas special.

Americans and English are bad, bad, bad with pronunciation. I can't tell you how many people I know who have been here a dozen years and more and cannot pronounce ANYTHING. Banho in Portuguese is the same as bano with the trill over the n in Spanish (have to hunt for that on this keyboard, sorry) and no one can figure that out. Also lh is like lya. Like vermelho is ver-mel-yo. How hard is that? No one can say it! I have a friend who lives in a village with an nh, and she can't pronounce it. I've told her how to say it maybe 20, 30 times, and she just can't. It's weird. The English are way, way worse.

 

[Admin.]

"We" The US and Prolly England have been difficult with foreign names forever, Swedes don't call their country Sweden, or Norwegians Norway, nor do Germans call their country Germany etc


Because we're a melting pot Yo!

 

[Lily]

Americans and English are bad, bad, bad with pronunciation. I can't tell you how many people I know who have been here a dozen years and more and cannot pronounce ANYTHING. Banho in Portuguese is the same as bano with the trill over the n in Spanish (have to hunt for that on this keyboard, sorry) and no one can figure that out. Also lh is like lya. Like vermelho is ver-mel-yo. How hard is that? No one can say it! I have a friend who lives in a village with an nh, and she can't pronounce it. I've told her how to say it maybe 20, 30 times, and she just can't. It's weird. The English are way, way worse.

I guessed the h would be silent in vermelho..it's logical. I don't even know what the word means.

The thing about the English is so weird.

I've heard some English actors use Spanish and they're generally better than American English speakers. The one that comes to mind is Judi Dench.

In one of her Bond roles she said "Rodriguez" perfectly. I heard another actor pronounce Spanish well too. I just assumed the English were better because they are more accustomed to hearing different European accents.

Maybe it's the educated English that are better at it?

 

[LotusBud]

I know three English people who speak fluent Portuguese. The rest, which is up there around 40, 50, 60 people that I've met don't say more than 20 words in Portuguese, and they pronounce those badly.

Vermelho is red. It is logical that it would be silent, but after you've been here for 10, 20 years, you should be able to figure it out. It is ALWAYS pronounced like a "y" when it comes after n or l. There are no exceptions.

I think if the English decide they want to learn, they are good with languages, But, interestingly, the vast majority of those I've met have decided they can't learn for some reason. But that isn't even true. I am the only American in my Portuguese class. There is one Dutch guy, and everyone else is English. They are trying really hard, but they really can't do it.

 

[Lily]

I know three English people who speak fluent Portuguese. The rest, which is up there around 40, 50, 60 people that I've met don't say more than 20 words in Portuguese, and they pronounce those badly.

Vermelho is red. It is logical that it would be silent, but after you've been here for 10, 20 years, you should be able to figure it out. It is ALWAYS pronounced like a "y" when it comes after n or l. There are no exceptions.

I think if the English decide they want to learn, they are good with languages, But, interestingly, the vast majority of those I've met have decided they can't learn for some reason. But that isn't even true. I am the only American in my Portuguese class. There is one Dutch guy, and everyone else is English. They are trying really hard, but they really can't do it.

Those types must butcher Spanish as well. The Brits don't have a good reputation in Spain. My bestie that spent a month in Portugal fairly recently saw a lot of Brits. He said they're totally obnoxious drunks and can't seem to handle their liquor.

 

[LotusBud]

Those types must butcher Spanish as well. The Brits don't have a good reputation in Spain. My bestie that spent a month in Portugal fairly recently saw a lot of Brits. He said they're totally obnoxious drunks and can't seem to handle their liquor.

The Brits down in the Algarve are horrible obnoxious drunks when they're on holiday. The ones who live here are not so bad. But, yeah, the holiday makers are the worst. But, honestly, the Brits I've met in the Algarve cannot be arsed to learn Portuguese, and they've opened all kinds of English restaurants and shops, etc., so they don't have to immerse themselves in too much Portuguese culture. I'd never live down there. I have an English friend who has lived here for 12 years and lived in Spain for 8 before, Hasn't set foot in the UK in 20 years. He speaks only English.

I met a Portuguese woman for the first time, and I spoke to her in Portuguese. The first thing she said to me was, "Oh. You're not English, then."

 

[Lily]

The Brits down in the Algarve are horrible obnoxious drunks when they're on holiday. The ones who live here are not so bad. But, yeah, the holiday makers are the worst. But, honestly, the Brits I've met in the Algarve cannot be arsed to learn Portuguese, and they've opened all kinds of English restaurants and shops, etc., so they don't have to immerse themselves in too much Portuguese culture. I'd never live down there. I have an English friend who has lived here for 12 years and lived in Spain for 8 before, Hasn't set foot in the UK in 20 years. He speaks only English.

I met a Portuguese woman for the first time, and I spoke to her in Portuguese. The first thing she said to me was, "Oh. You're not English, then."

English restaurants? Who wants to eat most English food?

I've only heard bad things about English food. I've also heard bad things about the food in the Netherlands. Of course, my friend that went there is Latino.

I'm guessing it's all pretty bland.

 

[Admin.]

English restaurants? Who wants to eat most English food?

I've only heard bad things about English food. I've also heard bad things about the food in the Netherlands. Of course, my friend that went there is Latino.

I'm guessing it's all pretty bland.

Indonesian Food is very good, I was introduced to it by my Wife's then boss who was Dutch, the Dutch of course have old ties to Indonesia.

 

[Lily]

Indonesian Food is very good, I was introduced to it by my Wife's then boss who was Dutch, the Dutch of course have old ties to Indonesia.

That is one cuisine I haven't run across. What's it like?

 

[Admin.]

That is one cuisine I haven't run across. What's it like?

It’s been ages, but not too different from Asian, maybe close to Thai cuisine with peanuts etc

 

[LotusBud]

English restaurants? Who wants to eat most English food?

I've only heard bad things about English food. I've also heard bad things about the food in the Netherlands. Of course, my friend that went there is Latino.

I'm guessing it's all pretty bland.

True English food is the worst. But they have mercifully been influenced by other cuisines. But, yeah, the English restaurants have shit like bangers and mash, and fish and chips.

Portuguese food is pretty bland, as well. But at least we have a lot of Italian, Indian, and some Asian food around. And if you're into meat, grilled Portuguese meats are pretty good. And feijoada with seafood is really good.

Brazilian food is good.

Some African women opened a restaurant here, but it went out of business before I could even get to it. A group of us planned to eat dinner there one night, and when we got there, it was gone. Poof!

Frango assado is really good.

Bacalhau (the 'lh' rule applies here - bawk awl yow) -- yuck!