We are civil, we are hygienic, we are adaptable.
1. Both Michigander men and women alike think nothing of pissing in the great outdoors, in the shower, down the bathtub or sink drain, in a Gatorade bottle on a long trip, on a front lawn near camouflaging shrubbery, when a traditional toilet or urinal is either occupied or gross.
2. We can make a delicious meal with either a can of tuna or Spam and jerky, potatoes, stolen corn, rice, pasta, or Sucker fish. We actually have or had a Suckerfest celebration to eat the nastiest of all fresh water fish (worse than even carp).
3. We can handle our liquor and beer is just frog's piss.... no reason to not drive (55 stay alive/drive between the lines or follow the two tracks in the snow).
4. Family is family is family.... unless an I-talian married into your family then eventually turned toxic after their spouses death or divorce. Ex I-talians are no longer family. They are not invited to the local berry patch for weekly bonfires where the adults drink Blatz, kids drink Verners, and we all eat burnt hotdogs and weird casseroles or crockpot dishes called "three meat stew " or "three bean and three bean stew".
5. Every Michigander by unwritten law is required to carry a 6 pack of toilet paper in their pickup truck, SUV, or bubble car along with folded up plastic shopping bags. A blanket or sleeping bag, tarp, Kentucky Fried Chicken moist towelettes, 6 Bic lighters or boxes of matches, 10 boxes of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, Fifth of Whiskey, and a box of Q-Tips. If they are caught without these things.... they're probably a Fudgie or recent transplant from Chicago.
1. Both Michigander men and women alike think nothing of pissing in the great outdoors, in the shower, down the bathtub or sink drain, in a Gatorade bottle on a long trip, on a front lawn near camouflaging shrubbery, when a traditional toilet or urinal is either occupied or gross.
2. We can make a delicious meal with either a can of tuna or Spam and jerky, potatoes, stolen corn, rice, pasta, or Sucker fish. We actually have or had a Suckerfest celebration to eat the nastiest of all fresh water fish (worse than even carp).
3. We can handle our liquor and beer is just frog's piss.... no reason to not drive (55 stay alive/drive between the lines or follow the two tracks in the snow).
4. Family is family is family.... unless an I-talian married into your family then eventually turned toxic after their spouses death or divorce. Ex I-talians are no longer family. They are not invited to the local berry patch for weekly bonfires where the adults drink Blatz, kids drink Verners, and we all eat burnt hotdogs and weird casseroles or crockpot dishes called "three meat stew " or "three bean and three bean stew".
5. Every Michigander by unwritten law is required to carry a 6 pack of toilet paper in their pickup truck, SUV, or bubble car along with folded up plastic shopping bags. A blanket or sleeping bag, tarp, Kentucky Fried Chicken moist towelettes, 6 Bic lighters or boxes of matches, 10 boxes of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, Fifth of Whiskey, and a box of Q-Tips. If they are caught without these things.... they're probably a Fudgie or recent transplant from Chicago.
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