I Love You Martini, But You Gotta Stop...

Dove

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It's not for the faint of heart.

The only thing that worries me is my mental health. I already have PTSD and Adhd....and i do pretty good without medication.

But i dont want to lose my damn shit due to menopause and ive heard a lot of women talk about how they just up tore their whole lives down.

Scares me a bit. If my daughters tell me im causing them concern im going to listen to them because if im losing it, theyll know better than anyone.

So would Shrek but come on....if HE said it, id get pissed and defensive because he is a man. As much as i love him, id think he was up to manly shenanigans and balderdash.

If i can get through this without making any extreme life changes that normal me would be horrified by.....ill be grateful.
 

Lily

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The only thing that worries me is my mental health. I already have PTSD and Adhd....and i do pretty good without medication.

But i dont want to lose my damn shit due to menopause and ive heard a lot of women talk about how they just up tore their whole lives down.

Scares me a bit. If my daughters tell me im causing them concern im going to listen to them because if im losing it, theyll know better than anyone.

So would Shrek but come on....if HE said it, id get pissed and defensive because he is a man. As much as i love him, id think he was up to manly shenanigans and balderdash.

If i can get through this without making any extreme life changes that normal me would be horrified by.....ill be grateful.

I don't imagine it gets that bad. When I was really in a foul mood, I'd tell my son and partner...I am coming in hot. Just let me have my space and I'll be alright soon enough. I could see it in myself.

They just let me be. They didn't have to tiptoe or anything, they just didn't mess with me when I wasn't feeling good. Also, my partner learned to have extra covers because I'd have fans going...lol
 

Dove

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I don't imagine it gets that bad. When I was really in a foul mood, I'd tell my son and partner...I am coming in hot. Just let me have my space and I'll be alright soon enough. I could see it in myself.

They just let me be. They didn't have to tiptoe or anything, they just didn't mess with me when I wasn't feeling good. Also, my partner learned to have extra covers because I'd have fans going...lol

Thats good to know. I was reading a thread on FB where women were talking about menopause and some of that was pretty scary.

I remind myself of my first pregnancy and how terrified i was. I didnt have a stable mother to give me that support and reassurance i needed. I just had to figure it out. I mean my mother in law was amazing so i had her. Other than that i just had the horror stories that older mothers loved telling me and id cry in bed at night because of how scared i was.

I got through that. Ill get through this. Thank you for saying this. I hear so much crazy shit from other women.
 

Lily

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Thats good to know. I was reading a thread on FB where women were talking about menopause and some of that was pretty scary.

I remind myself of my first pregnancy and how terrified i was. I didnt have a stable mother to give me that support and reassurance i needed. I just had to figure it out. I mean my mother in law was amazing so i had her. Other than that i just had the horror stories that older mothers loved telling me and id cry in bed at night because of how scared i was.

I got through that. Ill get through this. Thank you for saying this. I hear so much crazy shit from other women.

I never turned to HRT. The hormones manage symptoms. But my mother in law got breast cancer and it seems like the HRT might have been a contributing factor.

Menopause isn't a disease, it's not worth taking meds for it, imo. I didn't.
 

Dove

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I never turned to HRT. The hormones managed symptoms. But my mother in law got breast cancer and it seems like the HRT might have been a contributing factor.

Menopause isn't a disease, it's not worth taking meds for it, imo. I didn't.

Thank you for saying that too because thats been something i also worry about!

I dont want to be taking synthetic hormones. I want to let my body do its thing as naturally as possible.

I have a very close friend who was given hormonal birth control when she was 14 due to her intense PMDD. She ended up with breast cancer and had both of her breasts removed. She was 24. She also ended up infertile due to the chemo. Directly because of the birth control she took as a teenager.

Her mother was beyond devasted and felt like it was her fault too. It really spooked me away from taking any hormones for any reason.

Its been my goal to move through menopause without taking any hormones or "treatments" because, as you said, its not a disease. Its a normal, natural process.

I take my vitamins, some supplements, and i eat pretty healthy. Im active. Thats gonna have to be good enough.
 

Lily

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Thank you for saying that too because thats been something i also worry about!

I dont want to be taking synthetic hormones. I want to let my body do its thing as naturally as possible.

I have a very close friend who was given hormonal birth control when she was 14 due to her intense PMDD. She ended up with breast cancer and had both of her breasts removed. She was 24. She also ended up infertile due to the chemo. Directly because of the birth control she took as a teenager.

Her mother was beyond devasted and felt like it was her fault too. It really spooked me away from taking any hormones for any reason.

Its been my goal to move through menopause without taking any hormones or "treatments" because, as you said, its not a disease. Its a normal, natural process.

I take my vitamins, some supplements, and i eat pretty healthy. Im active. Thats gonna have to be good enough.

You can meditate as well for when you're feeling unduly stressed.
 

Dove

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You can meditate as well for when you're feeling unduly stressed.

I do that already. I try to get some yoga and pilates in every morning as well. At least three times a week.

Im hoping the skills i learned when i went through CBT will be helpful. Its been helpful with my anxiety.
 

Lily

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I do that already. I try to get some yoga and pilates in every morning as well. At least three times a week.

Im hoping the skills i learned when i went through CBT will be helpful. Its been helpful with my anxiety.

Best of luck. You'll get through it. There really isn't another option, we all come out on the other side.

Then it's all over...the cycle, the hormones, the discomfort...

It's quite wonderful, actually.
 

Dove

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Best of luck. You'll get through it. There really isn't another option, we all come out on the other side.

Then it's all over...the cycle, the hormones, the discomfort...

It's quite wonderful, actually.

Good to hear.

One part of me is excited in a way...beginning a new phase and era of my life. I can make it positive and funny. Model it for my daughters.

And the other part of me is like "welp kiddo its done. Your life is over. May as well crawl into the casket!!"

Dramatic i know but i am a drama queen lol
 

Lily

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Good to hear.

One part of me is excited in a way...beginning a new phase and era of my life. I can make it positive and funny. Model it for my daughters.

And the other part of me is like "welp kiddo its done. Your life is over. May as well crawl into the casket!!"

Dramatic i know but i am a drama queen lol

Hell no, it's not over. It's a new beginning...

I don't miss any of it. I feel free. Sex is free of an unintended pregnancy. You are still all woman without the more difficult "side affects" of womanhood.
 

Frood

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Yeah, embarrassing.

My boss was a doctor, I called her by her first name. I respected her as a professional and as a person, but she didn't stand on titles. She was fairly well-grounded, imo.

I make it a point to not use titles with anyone. Most doctors can't fix their own cars and most mechanics don't perform surgery.

However "Mechanic" is a title nobody uses. What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

Until domestic engineers, janitors, carpenters, et cetera get titles......fuck the rest.
 

Lily

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I make it a point to not use titles with anyone. Most doctors can't fix their own cars and most mechanics don't perform surgery.

However "Mechanic" is a title nobody uses. What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

Until domestic engineers, janitors, carpenters, et cetera get titles......fuck the rest.

I've met some dumb ass motherfuckers with PhDs and I've met some very sharp mechanics.

As my PhD partner says..."PhD, piled high and deeper". lol

His other favorite academia joke is "Why are academic disputes so fierce?"

"Because the stakes are so small." :LOL3:

I saw that in graduate school. I was the student rep for my program and would go to the meetings with the program professors. The things they bickered about...

One of the more memorable ones was the first meeting after summer break...their icebreaker was "What was the best thing about your summer?" One professor talked about hunting dear in a very animated way, another talked about having had sex with his wife one particular summer morning...the program director was a woman...she was pissed!

I knew that they were "trolling" her. I was sitting there counting the PhDs from Berkeley and Stanford and thinking...OM EM GEE...look at these people! while I tried maintaining a straight face.
 

Frood

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I've met some dumb ass motherfuckers with PhDs and I've met some very sharp mechanics.

As my PhD partner says..."PhD, piled high and deeper". lol

His other favorite academia joke is "Why are academic disputes so fierce?"

"Because the stakes are so small." :LOL3:

I saw that in graduate school. I was the student rep for my program and would go to the meetings with the program professors. The things they bickered about...

One of the more memorable ones was the first meeting after summer break...their icebreaker was "What was the best thing about your summer?" One professor talked about hunting dear in a very animated way, another talked about having had sex with his wife one particular summer morning...the program director was a woman...she was pissed!

I knew that they were "trolling" her. I was sitting there counting the PhDs from Berkeley and Stanford and thinking...OM EM GEE...look at these people! while I tried maintaining a straight face.

When I first moved to Australia, my wife's distant relative...a leading oncologist/surgeon and professor was invited to a big family dinner. He proceeded to sing the praises of socialist leaning Australia and openly ridicule the "backwards" US and its people.

Thing was, he had no idea about what he was shittalking. He mocked me when I suggested he get to intimately know the US instead of 2nd hand propaganda or brief fly in's to gated conferences. Then he threw the Dr card.

So I switched my approach when he started ranting about why people shouldn't be "allowed" firearms.

..."we have them in the US for elitist imbeciles like yourself".

He didn't like that...
 

The Cuntess

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Good to hear.

One part of me is excited in a way...beginning a new phase and era of my life. I can make it positive and funny. Model it for my daughters.

And the other part of me is like "welp kiddo its done. Your life is over. May as well crawl into the casket!!"

Dramatic i know but i am a drama queen lol


I hear horror stories. Not looking forward to it
 

Lily

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You should be in perimenopause right now with me, biiotch!!

The fuck you mean "not looking forward to it"? Dont tell me im starting first LOL.

You better get a hot flash or something tonight, mother fucker lol.


Neener neener...I'm way past it. Also means I'm older... lol