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It’s your inner child Alticus, my psychiatrist is working with me on that, I told her I feel like a child whose body has grown up around this feeling
 

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She did and exercise with me had me crying so much I couldn’t catch my breath, she embraced me and calmly told me none of it is your fault Steve
 

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She made me feel so good after, she said wouldn’t the little you feel so safe with the man I am now
 

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I was meant for better things, drinking in my 20’s and 30’s put me off track in life