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But a lot of it was very painful in a way that even at the time being a little kid I knew was gonna fuck me up permanently and it did
 
It was very wishy washy on my mom's mood, I could do something really bad and she wouldn't feel like dealing with it. No punishment. I could say the wrong thing and she'd slap me across the face instantly.
 
Created in me a lack of respect for authority and the belief that authority would be wishy washy which it is, sometimes you do bad shit and get caught and it's fine and other times you do the most minimal thing and get crucified