Adopt -A- n00b

Bastard Factory

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APPROVED!!



This n00bie is yours Gyroscope!



I believe he wanted a male, so you'll fit in nicely... he has shown an interests in you and an ability to type in coherent, grammatically correct sentences and @ 'THIS TIME' is not known to be dependent, depressed or otherwise mentally unstable.
 

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Multiple New Members (Newbs) find owner/handlers in celebrated Adoption Event!

Bastard Factory Forums, (WBFF/WWTF) -- The monthly "Adopt-A-n00b" day broke records across all internet message boards. The BFAAN Foundation reported a total of 3 n00bs were adopted out this week with all fees waived. According to Adopt-A-n00b spokesman BF, the typical time spent to adopt a new member — including de-worming, castration/circumcision and microchipping is less than 10 minutes.

"The hope is the event spikes hundreds of adoptions throughout Bastard Factory Forums and beyond," BF said.

Source...
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Bastard Factory

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Excited 2Thrilled @Lord Scrotum

We know that losing your n00b can be a very sad and even traumatic experience and that's one reason we strongly recommend microchipping them... The VeriChip Personal Identification System is a small radio frequency identification device (RFID) that is implanted into directly into your n00b.



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Gyroscope

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Dilf says he likes his new home very much. That bucket was supposed to be for his water but he keeps going to the bathroom in it and then drinking it after. I just keep putting water in it anyway. A high fiber dog food diet ensures he has diarrhea all day, every day. Any tips on how to get him to stop eating his own scat?

 

Gyroscope

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I'm still taking n00b applications. I think I'll put them into a deathmatch with Dilf, winner gets a slightly nicer cage. I would continue this cycle until Earth is purged of shitposters. I want my throne built atop a mountain of corpses.



Alternatively, my next n00b could be mated with Dilf to start an elite breed of weaponized ultimate gigashitposters. Multiple breedings would be required, not recommended for those who have weak holes. Gender does not matter; just like in Jurassic Park, nature finds a way.

The choice is yours.
 

Iggy McLulz

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I'm still taking n00b applications. I think I'll put them into a deathmatch with Dilf, winner gets a slightly nicer cage. I would continue this cycle until Earth is purged of shitposters. I want my throne built atop a mountain of corpses.



Alternatively, my next n00b could be mated with Dilf to start an elite breed of weaponized ultimate gigashitposters. Multiple breedings would be required, not recommended for those who have weak holes. Gender does not matter; just like in Jurassic Park, nature finds a way.

The choice is yours.
Hey want to put your n00b up against mine?
 

Gyroscope

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Okay. What kind of equipment should they be armed with?
I should warn you, Dilf has an inherent advantage in his retard strength.
 

Iggy McLulz

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Okay. What kind of equipment should they be armed with?
I should warn you, Dilf has an inherent advantage in his retard strength.
Just bring a body bag, you'll need it. Maybe put a helmet on him so you don't get hit with the splatter of his head exploding after Lord Scrotum word rapes him.
Okay. What kind of equipment should they be armed with?
I should warn you, Dilf has an inherent advantage in his retard strength.
:LOL1:
:LMAO3::ThumbsUp3:
Awwww fuck, I gotta get dewormed? That sucks, I'll have to go buy a feather to tickle my own ass with now. :Pissed:
You can tickle your ass with Uncle Dilf. I just entered you into a n00b fighting match with him. Seemed like a fun idea, you cool with this?
 

aunty mabels cuntwash

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Awwww fuck, I gotta get dewormed? That sucks, I'll have to go buy a feather to tickle my own ass with now. :Pissed:
You can tickle your ass with Uncle Dilf. I just entered you into a n00b fighting match with him. Seemed like a fun idea, you cool with this?
Steady on, I said a feather, not a whole fucking turkey.


Le sigh. :Confused3:


Okay, if you insist. When, where and is he sanitary?
 

Bastard Factory

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Awwww fuck, I gotta get dewormed? That sucks, I'll have to go buy a feather to tickle my own ass with now. :Pissed:
You can tickle your ass with Uncle Dilf. I just entered you into a n00b fighting match with him. Seemed like a fun idea, you cool with this?
Steady on, I said a feather, not a whole fucking turkey.


Le sigh. :Confused3:


Okay, if you insist. When, where and is he sanitary?
Threads like this are a great way to meet people with similar interests, so embrace a new member and he or she will embrace you!

You n00bs won't really feel significant until someone adopts you.

So who else would like to be owned?
 

Iggy McLulz

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Awwww fuck, I gotta get dewormed? That sucks, I'll have to go buy a feather to tickle my own ass with now. :Pissed:
You can tickle your ass with Uncle Dilf. I just entered you into a n00b fighting match with him. Seemed like a fun idea, you cool with this?
Steady on, I said a feather, not a whole fucking turkey.


Le sigh. :Confused3:


Okay, if you insist. When, where and is he sanitary?
:LOL2: this is why I never leave you behind. He's been dewormed and chipped ect..., the main Bastard doesn't want to spread anything around here. I don't know when your "turkey" likes to come around but he's locked in Meltdown. I figure you'll be able to happily tickle your ass with the finest feather of your choosing in about 3 minutes start to finish.
 

ahtaC yddaM

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The entire first page is just 3 people posting and 2 of them think it's 10+ people.

Fucking lol.

This is masterclass sockmanship.
 

Iggy McLulz

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I can smell socks fucking 10 miles away, nothing going on here. You know damn well I am Iggy.
 

ahtaC yddaM

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I can smell socks fucking 10 miles away, nothing going on here. You know damn well I am Iggy.
You're permanently high.

Fuck makes you think that I think you can think?

Would Jibbles like to be Dilf's girlfriend?
Shut up, @Bastard Factory

The entire first page is just 3 people posting and 2 of them think it's 10+ people.

Fucking lol.

This is masterclass sockmanship.
My balls are hairy yours appear to be crystal... Let’s say “you’re right” what now? None thing...
Shut up, @Bastard Factory