Happy New Jear Bastard Cracktory

[Master]

Wait, do you smell that? Just clicking onto this forum the stench of shattered dreams, social awkwardness, and tubes of the lotion like Vaseline reek like a perfume section at Macys.

Why hello, it’s moi, the dashing, handsome, and feel good story of this community, King Martini, Poofer, Kevin, a man of many names and inches…you know…. down there. The man who put a message board on his back and created so much interest it was hitting social media from the heavy flow of drama I caused over a Nintendo switch. Come to think of it, I should be getting a check for the interest I created. Me. The killer app.

Now, I hope all you retards are having good fortune and positive vibes. Life is too short to hold grudges. So for this new year, yours truly is turning a new leaf, a kindler, gentler Martini. A pallet cleanser, if you will. The aperitif of this community I shall be.

Yes, my underlings, it’s time to take your pants off and relax.

To Flea- she who have me the ball to dribble down the court and slam dunk that shit into flametowne lore, so much so, the rabble still talks about it, may you sleep in an awkward position and your fake ass turn into a pancake. You do know somebody with a lit cigarette can pop those Shit bags, yeah?

To Blandscape- keep doing what your doing, my crown as the GOAT now fits snuggly on top of your pointed head. See, as the best this community, it’s my responsibility to pass on that title, nobody else can do it. Just don’t post no more pictures, your face looks like a nutsack.

To Fox- Let’s stream.

To Caskur- You never got the credit you deserved, but honestly, you are one relentless old bag. A Flame warrior. A hero. The Axle Rose of flaming.

To Fraud- one of the GOATS of trolling and a damn nice guy on top. We shall meet up for drinks one day.

To Bra1n- truly one of the GOATS. The guy who taught me how to edit and let me shit all over anybody with no reprisals. And hint- we never were at odds on these forums, we just trolled the shit out of everyone.

To Evil Blood- The smartest guy this community has ever seen. Living, breathing internet terror. He told me to leave when he did and I should have listened. Nobody better and nobody will ever be on his level.

To Sum Cunt- Too talented for these forums.

IYE- The guy who helped me refine my style. Told me what was funny and to stick to that.

TOE- one of the only guys I stopped what I was doing to read his post. Cool AF for a Canuck.

So, don’t expect me to post, don’t expect any replies. Maybe I’ll make a podcast here and there, but typing out gems to chumps isn’t my idea of creative time spent.

Sham, good luck on the recovery, Flynn, my dick is bigger then yours, Blurto, your dick is bigger then mine, Peaches, Boba Fett was stuck in your sarlacc pit face for 20 years, Lotus, have you ever corn row braided your bush?

Here’s to 2022!!

 

[Frood]

Happy Holidays, dude.

 

[The Scoundrel]

So, don’t expect me to post, don’t expect any replies.

Good thing/Bad thing

Good thing: No need to read any of the tedious drivel this spammer's been flooding the boards with for a lifetime.

Bad thing: The good folk of Flame Towne will yet again have to wait to see you get net deathed by me in finality. You've run for years my little fruit bat. One day son. One day.

Oh, and Kevin.

Dovey sent me this when she'd just fucked you.

 

[DDT]

Happy New Years to all! Have some snow...

 

[Frood]

Happy New Years to all! Have some snow...

 

[DDT]

My Cousin went to one of his live performances, when Snow was actually still a thing...

Apparently he could put on a decent show!

 

[Frood]

My Cousin went to his live show, when Snow was actually still a thing...

Cool... I was living in 10 foot snow drifts at the time too!

 

[DDT]

Cool... I was living in 10 foot snow drifts at the time too!

Now you get to cook in 45 degree weather. There is simply no solution for us living outside of Western Europe.

Western Europe simply doesn't have these extremes, and in one way that's good... On the other hand, White people are easily bored and get motivated by extremes!

 

[Frood]

Cool... I was living in 10 foot snow drifts at the time too!

Now you get to cook in 45 degree weather. There is simply no solution for us living outside of Western Europe.

Western Europe simply doesn't have these extremes, and in one way that's good... On the other hand, White people are easily bored and get motivated by extremes!

I'm fine with extremes... I was raised to sweat and bundle up. You motherfuckers would cark it...

 

[DDT]

I'm fine with extremes... I was raised to sweat and bundle up. You motherfuckers would cark it...

Cold I can handle with ease! I hate extreme heat, and give you Auzzies credit for being able to handle it...

 

[Seamajor]

Please, Log in or Register to view URLs content!

Keep your snow and cold. It’s awesome for about 15 minutes

 

[DDT]

Please, Log in or Register to view URLs content!

Keep your snow and cold. It’s awesome for about 15 minutes

While I can understand your appreciation for more tropical regions, I like a nice snowy Winter. Sometimes it's nice to chill right down...

Cold temps keeps the strange bugs at bay also...

 

[Frood]

I'm fine with extremes... I was raised to sweat and bundle up. You motherfuckers would cark it...

Cold I can handle with ease! I hate extreme heat, and give you Auzzies credit for being able to handle it...

It's not a choice... you just do it.

 

[DDT]

It's not a choice... you just do it.

It's too hot! Even you were complaining about it the other day!

I'll stay in Canada for now...

 

[Frood]

It's not a choice... you just do it.

It's too hot! Even you were complaining about it the other day!

I'll stay in Canada for now...

I used to complain about North American winters until I got down to Australia and had to deal with 0-3c degree rain winters.... that shit fucks you up real quick.

I was in upwards of 35-45c below zero and totally fine.... had the gear...had the training....but HERE? 4 seasons in a day... I was fucked one time and couldn't get a cab in time to save my life.

Nobody was biting or coming my way and I had already started shaking... then stopped. I called my ex wife and she was in the car with our sleepy son before I could say sorry.

Took me hours to come out of hypothermia... she stripped off and warmed me.

...and then I knew that I made the biggest mistake I ever could in my life by staying apart from her.

I love her, don't deserve her...

 

[The Countess]

It’s like 40 degrees here right now. Anything under 60 is freezing to me lol

 

[DDT]

Treat her well, as it's what you should do.

Mine left me, but will still communicate. Basically wants nothing to do with me though. I can't blame her.

 

[DDT]

It’s like 40 degrees here right now. Anything under 60 is freezing to me lol

I don't mind beaners, but I'm glad you don't like the cold temps...

 

[Aylana]

Say wha wha, KM

Blandscape is the quintessential, "one post is all that is needed" to bury this fucking gyrating spaztic under his own inflated hyperbole.

if this assclown is the new BF influencer and "content creator", then everyone just died in your arms tonight, we keep lookin' for quality but broken syntax blandscape spam lies all around us and I don't see any hope left.

 

[Master]

Say wha wha, KM

Blandscape is the quintessential, "one post is all that is needed" to bury this fucking gyrating spaztic under his own inflated hyperbole.

if this assclown is the new BF influencer and "content creator", then everyone just died in your arms tonight, we keep lookin' for quality but broken syntax blandscape spam lies all around us and I don't see any hope left.

Must have been something you said.

Blandscape is so good at this, it goes over each and every one of youz guyz heads. He completely shits on all of you and you don’t even catch it.

Now, before I was so rudely interrupted by Fortnite, there was some things I have to finish out;

Wait, why the FUCK is Scoundrel admitting on open forum about talking about another man’s penis? Wasn’t Scoundrel laughed off FT for some invisible drug dealers going to kill ppl or something like that? Fucker will fit in perfectly here.

The BF tiktok- I created a bf tiktok that is actually successful and trending upwards. Last time I checked, it had over 15k followers. It’s mostly game play videos tho and I really don’t think anybody on this forum has the skills I do at FN or CoD. The goal was to transition to posting content from this site, but there really isn’t anything good enough to post. Trolling in gaming is one thing, the shit fest that this place has become is another.

The 300 new follower promise- I am going to do a giveaway and the first 300 ppl who register here and post will get a new FN skin. That’s the easiest way to get traffic and I’m shocked nobody thought of that.

“But KM, little kids play Fortnite”

Actually, the age demo has shifted considerably during the pandemic with 18 to 24 being the biggest demo now. If you look on Twitch, that’s pretty much the core.

So much so, I was playing random squads and had a team of adults who truly sucked balls and carried them to a final 1v1 where they all got wiped by actual players and it was me against a bot who I dropped down to 1 hp then ejected from the match. Not giving a bunch of adults trying to tell me, a highly ranked player on the actual rankings, how to play.

I told them, look me up on tracker, I’m ranked in the top 20 while you crumbs are ranked in the millions. Sucks to be them.

And why is it when you creampie a girl whose name begins with the letter A they suddenly think you have some sort of subliminal bond with them?

 

[LotusBud]

It’s like 40 degrees here right now. Anything under 60 is freezing to me lol

It was 3 below zero here two days ago. Now, that's cold.

 

[The Scoundrel]

And I thought it wasn't going to post?

There should be a new word for fails of this magnitude.

Oh yeah. A Kevin. Already done.

 

[SHAMPAIN]

Say wha wha, KM

Blandscape is the quintessential, "one post is all that is needed" to bury this fucking gyrating spaztic under his own inflated hyperbole.

if this assclown is the new BF influencer and "content creator", then everyone just died in your arms tonight, we keep lookin' for quality but broken syntax blandscape spam lies all around us and I don't see any hope left.

Must have been something you said.

Blandscape is so good at this, it goes over each and every one of youz guyz heads. He completely shits on all of you and you don’t even catch it.

Now, before I was so rudely interrupted by Fortnite, there was some things I have to finish out;

Wait, why the FUCK is Scoundrel admitting on open forum about talking about another man’s penis? Wasn’t Scoundrel laughed off FT for some invisible drug dealers going to kill ppl or something like that? Fucker will fit in perfectly here.

The BF tiktok- I created a bf tiktok that is actually successful and trending upwards. Last time I checked, it had over 15k followers. It’s mostly game play videos tho and I really don’t think anybody on this forum has the skills I do at FN or CoD. The goal was to transition to posting content from this site, but there really isn’t anything good enough to post. Trolling in gaming is one thing, the shit fest that this place has become is another.

The 300 new follower promise- I am going to do a giveaway and the first 300 ppl who register here and post will get a new FN skin. That’s the easiest way to get traffic and I’m shocked nobody thought of that.

“But KM, little kids play Fortnite”

Actually, the age demo has shifted considerably during the pandemic with 18 to 24 being the biggest demo now. If you look on Twitch, that’s pretty much the core.

So much so, I was playing random squads and had a team of adults who truly sucked balls and carried them to a final 1v1 where they all got wiped by actual players and it was me against a bot who I dropped down to 1 hp then ejected from the match. Not giving a bunch of adults trying to tell me, a highly ranked player on the actual rankings, how to play.

I told them, look me up on tracker, I’m ranked in the top 20 while you crumbs are ranked in the millions. Sucks to be them.

And why is it when you creampie a girl whose name begins with the letter A they suddenly think you have some sort of subliminal bond with them?

"ME, ME, ME, ME, ME, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, QUALITY CONTENT, QUALITY CONTENT, QUALITY CONTENT"
I'm still waiting on YOU delivering something note worthy instead of bleating on about the "glory days" that clearly weren't all that glorious for you or your other self proclaimed "legends" that nobody out of a bubble of twelve board killers had ever even heard of before... Blandscape shits on nobody here, he spams shit that I don't even read but I suppose you schizos would see that as a fuckin win, you belong in the short bus...
You got a link to this "Tik Tok"? No, didn't think so...

 

[Master]

You though wrong, you regurgitated Pap smear of a human being.

“Expecting “ me to post and not posting at all are two different things.

Kind of like threatening ppl at a forum that some drug dealers were going to come track them down when nobody at that forum actually gave a shit about you.

Seriously, what was that all about? Everyone laughed at you. Some grade school troll that blew up in your face was like a “hey, grown ass adults, if you do something this stupid as a troll you will look like a fool” moment that is encapsulated within the annals of this communities history like an elephant having a wet dream. Idk if you should be proud or ashamed of yourself.

And srsly, why is a grown ass man having a conversation about another man’s penis? And how many times did you lick your lips in anticipation over every bit of information regarding it?

Face it, fail captain, you don’t play this shit that good.

 

[Master]

Say wha wha, KM

Blandscape is the quintessential, "one post is all that is needed" to bury this fucking gyrating spaztic under his own inflated hyperbole.

if this assclown is the new BF influencer and "content creator", then everyone just died in your arms tonight, we keep lookin' for quality but broken syntax blandscape spam lies all around us and I don't see any hope left.

Must have been something you said.

Blandscape is so good at this, it goes over each and every one of youz guyz heads. He completely shits on all of you and you don’t even catch it.

Now, before I was so rudely interrupted by Fortnite, there was some things I have to finish out;

Wait, why the FUCK is Scoundrel admitting on open forum about talking about another man’s penis? Wasn’t Scoundrel laughed off FT for some invisible drug dealers going to kill ppl or something like that? Fucker will fit in perfectly here.

The BF tiktok- I created a bf tiktok that is actually successful and trending upwards. Last time I checked, it had over 15k followers. It’s mostly game play videos tho and I really don’t think anybody on this forum has the skills I do at FN or CoD. The goal was to transition to posting content from this site, but there really isn’t anything good enough to post. Trolling in gaming is one thing, the shit fest that this place has become is another.

The 300 new follower promise- I am going to do a giveaway and the first 300 ppl who register here and post will get a new FN skin. That’s the easiest way to get traffic and I’m shocked nobody thought of that.

“But KM, little kids play Fortnite”

Actually, the age demo has shifted considerably during the pandemic with 18 to 24 being the biggest demo now. If you look on Twitch, that’s pretty much the core.

So much so, I was playing random squads and had a team of adults who truly sucked balls and carried them to a final 1v1 where they all got wiped by actual players and it was me against a bot who I dropped down to 1 hp then ejected from the match. Not giving a bunch of adults trying to tell me, a highly ranked player on the actual rankings, how to play.

I told them, look me up on tracker, I’m ranked in the top 20 while you crumbs are ranked in the millions. Sucks to be them.

And why is it when you creampie a girl whose name begins with the letter A they suddenly think you have some sort of subliminal bond with them?

"ME, ME, ME, ME, ME, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, QUALITY CONTENT, QUALITY CONTENT, QUALITY CONTENT"
I'm still waiting on YOU delivering something note worthy instead of bleating on about the "glory days" that clearly weren't all that glorious for you or your other self proclaimed "legends" that nobody out of a bubble of twelve board killers had ever even heard of before... Blandscape shits on nobody here, he spams shit that I don't even read but I suppose you schizos would see that as a fuckin win, you belong in the short bus...
You got a link to this "Tik Tok"? No, didn't think so...

I mean, I could…. But why?

Im not here to entertain what, five? Six ppl? That tiktok you mentioned? I get paid to post on it. There’s a blatant ad that followers shit spammed that has made quite a penny that carried over into other posts.

I also told BF himself I’d give him the keys to it once this place had traction. It doesn’t. But, since we’re going to talk about something other then yours truly, who is going to take it over once I pass it off?

You? Look around you. This place is nothing but a whine fest bore pit stop. That falls on the mods, and no offense, the reason I gave up my panel here is because there’s no fixing it.

Blandscape makes great content. So does Caskur when she feels like it. You need to focus on the actual content creators and phase out the filler. Fox makes dynamic content, he should be featured.

The ppl who can create something that would make some random register and post should be the ppl that you are focusing to build around. But…you don’t. If you read one thread here, you’ve read them all. It wasn’t like that at BH, FC, or F4$. Content is so dummied down right now there’s no way in hell anybody from the past with even a shred of talent will waste time here.

Chrome, somebody who I think is Nozz, and some other BH reject posts on some gaming forum. There’s about five old BH’rs over at Kiwi. I spoke briefly with The Iron Duke a couple months ago, NA is all over Reddit along with Gunzablazin.

I should bring these guys here? I’d be embarrassed. There’s already a few BH’ers here. They don’t post at all and you would be shocked who they were.

So, the only person who has a shot at bringing them here is me.

Make better content. Simple as that.

 

[SHAMPAIN]

Ahhh the slow burn post... lol TL~DR

 

[Master]

White flag duly noted.

Too many words, not enough brain cells

 

[The Scoundrel]

I should bring these guys here? I’d be embarrassed. There’s already a few BH’ers here. They don’t post at all and you would be shocked who they were.

Still not posting Kevin?

You are the original and most blatant spammner.

Between you and Caskur it's hard to tell the difference nowadays.

Have you lost your menial job again and have time on your hands and free wi-fi?

 

[Aylana]

I should bring these guys here? I’d be embarrassed. There’s already a few BH’ers here. They don’t post at all and you would be shocked who they were.

Still not posting Kevin?

You are the original and most blatant spammner.

Between you and Caskur it's hard to tell the difference nowadays.

Have you lost your menial job again and have time on your hands and free wi-fi?

you are a toothless, yappy chi wa wa dog

you even copied Cunty with his wad of cash and box of nectar photo by posting a photo of your crusty keyboard covered in chewed up xanax pills

you have always been the forum equivalent of the guy crawling into a toilet in "Trainspotting".

 

[Aylana]

Say wha wha, KM

Blandscape is the quintessential, "one post is all that is needed" to bury this fucking gyrating spaztic under his own inflated hyperbole.

if this assclown is the new BF influencer and "content creator", then everyone just died in your arms tonight, we keep lookin' for quality but broken syntax blandscape spam lies all around us and I don't see any hope left.

Must have been something you said.

Blandscape is so good at this, it goes over each and every one of youz guyz heads. He completely shits on all of you and you don’t even catch it.

Now, before I was so rudely interrupted by Fortnite, there was some things I have to finish out;

Wait, why the FUCK is Scoundrel admitting on open forum about talking about another man’s penis? Wasn’t Scoundrel laughed off FT for some invisible drug dealers going to kill ppl or something like that? Fucker will fit in perfectly here.

The BF tiktok- I created a bf tiktok that is actually successful and trending upwards. Last time I checked, it had over 15k followers. It’s mostly game play videos tho and I really don’t think anybody on this forum has the skills I do at FN or CoD. The goal was to transition to posting content from this site, but there really isn’t anything good enough to post. Trolling in gaming is one thing, the shit fest that this place has become is another.

The 300 new follower promise- I am going to do a giveaway and the first 300 ppl who register here and post will get a new FN skin. That’s the easiest way to get traffic and I’m shocked nobody thought of that.

“But KM, little kids play Fortnite”

Actually, the age demo has shifted considerably during the pandemic with 18 to 24 being the biggest demo now. If you look on Twitch, that’s pretty much the core.

So much so, I was playing random squads and had a team of adults who truly sucked balls and carried them to a final 1v1 where they all got wiped by actual players and it was me against a bot who I dropped down to 1 hp then ejected from the match. Not giving a bunch of adults trying to tell me, a highly ranked player on the actual rankings, how to play.

I told them, look me up on tracker, I’m ranked in the top 20 while you crumbs are ranked in the millions. Sucks to be them.

And why is it when you creampie a girl whose name begins with the letter A they suddenly think you have some sort of subliminal bond with them?

"ME, ME, ME, ME, ME, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, QUALITY CONTENT, QUALITY CONTENT, QUALITY CONTENT"
I'm still waiting on YOU delivering something note worthy instead of bleating on about the "glory days" that clearly weren't all that glorious for you or your other self proclaimed "legends" that nobody out of a bubble of twelve board killers had ever even heard of before... Blandscape shits on nobody here, he spams shit that I don't even read but I suppose you schizos would see that as a fuckin win, you belong in the short bus...
You got a link to this "Tik Tok"? No, didn't think so...

I mean, I could…. But why?

Im not here to entertain what, five? Six ppl? That tiktok you mentioned? I get paid to post on it. There’s a blatant ad that followers shit spammed that has made quite a penny that carried over into other posts.

I also told BF himself I’d give him the keys to it once this place had traction. It doesn’t. But, since we’re going to talk about something other then yours truly, who is going to take it over once I pass it off?

You? Look around you. This place is nothing but a whine fest bore pit stop. That falls on the mods, and no offense, the reason I gave up my panel here is because there’s no fixing it.

Blandscape makes great content. So does Caskur when she feels like it. You need to focus on the actual content creators and phase out the filler. Fox makes dynamic content, he should be featured.

The ppl who can create something that would make some random register and post should be the ppl that you are focusing to build around. But…you don’t. If you read one thread here, you’ve read them all. It wasn’t like that at BH, FC, or F4$. Content is so dummied down right now there’s no way in hell anybody from the past with even a shred of talent will waste time here.

Chrome, somebody who I think is Nozz, and some other BH reject posts on some gaming forum. There’s about five old BH’rs over at Kiwi. I spoke briefly with The Iron Duke a couple months ago, NA is all over Reddit along with Gunzablazin.

I should bring these guys here? I’d be embarrassed. There’s already a few BH’ers here. They don’t post at all and you would be shocked who they were.

So, the only person who has a shot at bringing them here is me.

Make better content. Simple as that.

the main twitchers like xQCoW and cohncarnage play whatever hot game is on steam or the latest PS5/Xbox video game that has the most hype, sometimes days before it's released because they get advance copies.

then you got the lewd gamers like Iron Mouse and Projext melody playing prison break and talking about sniffing assholes in the showers and break out boners, crazy funny commentary while they play these games.

or you got all those weird role players in GTA5 steaming that stuff

the biggest news of 2022 is the release of the Cuphead expansion, that will be the big twich stream when it drops, the rage and cussing will be amazing

and for blandscape, as cunty said, he is a one trick spammer. His ADD/AHD/Autism act is probably not an act. they guy has not written anything since Turd Rail, his poetry is only fit for 4chan and troll boards.

He's probably holding a damp towel between his legs and doing a thigh crunch to replicate the sensation of a girl becoming wet while text spamming like a high school teenager.

He's yells Dovey's name with all the drama of Charles Foster Kane saying "Rosebud" in Citizen Kane.

So yeah, he is the chosen one to lead BF to greatness and save the baby Yoda.

Honestly, he is probably the only one in the "community" who does nothing else in life but live on troll boards because this kind of shit gives him purpose. You saw how giddy and excited he became when he thought there was going to be a match.