I'd have a broke dick if I were forced to fuck someone as fat and ugly as you. fo sure
Free advice on shagging a mountain.
Never try for the cunt, you'll disappear in those rolls of blubber.
Content yourself with rubbing off on a ripple. You'll still get a happy ending and she can brag to her mates that even whilst needing a hoist mechanism to take a bath she can still pull for a drunk karaoke singer.
Fat birds are welcomed at Japanese establishments due to their resemblance to Sumo stars in their homeland.