Worst Pickup Lines Ever

[Master]

Girls dont say no to me, im like a wedding ring.


Your welcome

 

[chew the fat]

oh my little pretty one ...

when you gunna give me some ...

and make my motor run ...

cause i'm never gunna stop...

until you drop your pretty top ...

my my my Sharona ... ✔



If this don't work, I'll give up ...


Copyright Disclaimer under Section 107 of the copyright act 1976, allowance is made for fair use for purposes such as making up cool pick up lines, miss using record lyrics, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favour of fair use.

 

[LotusBud]

Dumbfuckingest pickup line I ever heard: Who here wants to fuck?
The women scattered without a word or a second glance. Poof! Gone!!!!

 

[Blurt]

Lotus, it's pretty dark and dank in here.

You want to maybe go for a walk in the sunshine, smell the breeze coming off the ocean?

I have to say, you have a mystery about you. But I like to think of myself as a great detective. And now I'm hooked by the clue in your eyes.

Oh, and I brought us each a mini-umbrella hat. Just take my hand and let the world think of us what it will.

Walk with me, won't you?

 

[chew the fat]

Does ''I like you, wanna go out'' still work these days or does that contain too much sexual innuendo ...

 

[Breakfall]

This seedy chick in Melbourne walked up to me, looked me in the eyes in a sultry manner, reached under and abruptly cupped my balls in her hand and said, “well that feels like a bit of awright!”

 

[TheHaze]

This seedy chick in Melbourne walked up to me, looked me in the eyes in a sultry manner, reached under and abruptly cupped my balls in her hand and said, “well that feels like a bit of awright!”

Sounds like you have been watching to much china porn - - - - - -

 

[Breakfall]

This seedy chick in Melbourne walked up to me, looked me in the eyes in a sultry manner, reached under and abruptly cupped my balls in her hand and said, “well that feels like a bit of awright!”

Sounds like you have been watching to much china porn - - - - - -

I was on business. And you spelt “too” wrong.

 

[chew the fat]

How about this for the upmarket well dressed educated chick ...

So shalt thou show me friendship, take thou that I shalt show thy friendship back.

 

[Breakfall]

How about this for the upmarket well dressed educated chick ...

So shalt thou show me friendship, take thou that I shalt show thy friendship back.

Her fanny would’ve tasted funny by the sound of that absolute tripe that she uttered.

 

[Blurt]

This seedy chick in Melbourne walked up to me, looked me in the eyes in a sultry manner, reached under and abruptly cupped my balls in her hand and said, “well that feels like a bit of awright!”

So you not only surf and Wang Chung but you play golf, too?

 

[Breakfall]

This seedy chick in Melbourne walked up to me, looked me in the eyes in a sultry manner, reached under and abruptly cupped my balls in her hand and said, “well that feels like a bit of awright!”

So you not only surf and Wang Chung but you play golf, too?

I played a little golf. I did a lot better playing competitive lawn bowls.

 

[RANCIDMILKO ™ ®©]

I'm the one getting picked up these days, so I need to recheck my priorities

 

[Breakfall]

I'm the one getting picked up these days, so I need to recheck my priorities

Here‘s a good Aussie pickup line:

Do you fuck on first dates
Does you Dad own a brewery
Could I feel Your tits
Or would you show 'em to me
Cause you've got a nice head
And you look pretty honest
So me face'll be leavin' in quart of an hour
I'd like you to be on it

 

[chew the fat]

Would ... ''can I drop you off at home'' work or is that too much pressure on the female population ...

 

[The Scoundrel]

How do you like your eggs in the morning?

Fertilised or not?

 

[chew the fat]

I think the sophisticated approach could work with a lot of girls ...

They play hard to get while we watch sport on tv to divert their attention from the subject at hand ...

 

[Blurt]

How do you like your eggs in the morning?

Fertilised or not?

To which she replies: "You know a bloke with a sizzling sausage, then?"

Back to the drawing board.

 

[Blurt]

"Please join me for breakfast. Bangers and mash sound good?"

 

[Breakfall]

"Please join me for breakfast. Bangers and mash sound good?"

To which he replies: “…my haemorrhoids are playing up, that’s not a nice way to get a lady’s bell-end moist!”

 

[chew the fat]

Is there a pickup line out there you could use that if you were just driving down a street and you see a woman standing on the footpath say holding up a street light and you attempt to use a cool pickup line on her and she goes for it big time but wants money just as a gift type of thing as well do think that would be a cool pickup that works ...?

 

[Breakfall]

Is there a pickup line out there you could use that if you were just driving down a street and you see a woman standing on the footpath say holding up a street light and you attempt to use a cool pickup line on her and she goes for it big time but wants money just as a gift type of thing as well do think that would be a cool pickup that works ...?

Roxanne
(Roxanne, Roxanne)
You don't have to put on the red light
Those days are over
You don't have to sell your body to the night
(Roxanne, Roxanne)

 

[DDT]

Here‘s a good Aussie pickup line:

Do you fuck on first dates
Does you Dad own a brewery
Could I feel Your tits
Or would you show 'em to me
Cause you've got a nice head
And you look pretty honest
So me face'll be leavin' in quart of an hour
I'd like you to be on it

Kevin was awesome. Friend of my parents brought some Kevin tapes home from a trip to Australia in the 1980's. As a kid, they were humorous to me...

To this day, The Pubic Hair Song and Mick the Master Farter will still bring a smile to my face, and those around me also if I play it! Those that are offended can get the fuck off my property!

Wilson started my journey into the world knowing there were differences between races and cultures, and it's OK to acknowledge those differences in a humorous way.

 

[Breakfall]

Here‘s a good Aussie pickup line:

Do you fuck on first dates
Does you Dad own a brewery
Could I feel Your tits
Or would you show 'em to me
Cause you've got a nice head
And you look pretty honest
So me face'll be leavin' in quart of an hour
I'd like you to be on it

Kevin was awesome. Friend of my parents brought some Kevin tapes home from a trip to Australia in the 1980's. As a kid, they were humorous to me...

To this day, The Pubic Hair Song and Mick the Master Farter will still bring a smile to my face, and those around me also if I play it! Those that are offended can get the fuck off my property!

Wilson started my journey into the world knowing there were differences between races and cultures, and it's OK to acknowledge those differences in a humorous way.

Bloody oath mate…put the art back into farting with his fuel-injected arse! Lol. My uncle sent the tape to us when we were in in SAfrica. Whenever we had a sore throat, we used to say the Chinese segment of the pubic hair song:

“Harsow…. hive got this little pubic hair, stuck in back of froat!”

 

[chew the fat]

Is there a pickup line out there you could use that if you were just driving down a street and you see a woman standing on the footpath say holding up a street light and you attempt to use a cool pickup line on her and she goes for it big time but wants money just as a gift type of thing as well do think that would be a cool pickup that works ...?

Roxanne
(Roxanne, Roxanne)
You don't have to put on the red light
Those days are over
You don't have to sell your body to the night
(Roxanne, Roxanne)

You know, I think I'm on to something here ...

Why not just drop those stupid pickup lines us idiots use to put the chicks in a feel good mood, we could just give the girls a lovely thoughtful gift of cash and then straight on to a proper good night out ...

I think I might be on a winner with this new idea ...

 

[Breakfall]

Is there a pickup line out there you could use that if you were just driving down a street and you see a woman standing on the footpath say holding up a street light and you attempt to use a cool pickup line on her and she goes for it big time but wants money just as a gift type of thing as well do think that would be a cool pickup that works ...?

Roxanne
(Roxanne, Roxanne)
You don't have to put on the red light
Those days are over
You don't have to sell your body to the night
(Roxanne, Roxanne)

You know, I think I'm on to something here ...

Why not just drop those stupid pickup lines us idiots use to put the chicks in a feel good mood, we could just give the girls a lovely thoughtful gift of cash and then straight on to a proper good night out ...

I think I might be on a winner with this new idea ...

I’ve always treating chicks to a good night out. I love them. I’ve honestly never really struck out. It’s all about chivalry and a pleasant smile really.

 

[chew the fat]

Is there a pickup line out there you could use that if you were just driving down a street and you see a woman standing on the footpath say holding up a street light and you attempt to use a cool pickup line on her and she goes for it big time but wants money just as a gift type of thing as well do think that would be a cool pickup that works ...?

Roxanne
(Roxanne, Roxanne)
You don't have to put on the red light
Those days are over
You don't have to sell your body to the night
(Roxanne, Roxanne)

You know, I think I'm on to something here ...

Why not just drop those stupid pickup lines us idiots use to put the chicks in a feel good mood, we could just give the girls a lovely thoughtful gift of cash and then straight on to a proper good night out ...

I think I might be on a winner with this new idea ...

I’ve always treating chicks to a good night out. I love them. I’ve honestly never really struck out. It’s all about chivalry and a pleasant smile really.

Yeah, same here ...

First thing I do on a date is I take the girl down to the local park and onto the swings to see how high I can push her up and then over to the slippery slides and see who can slide down the quickest, then to the see-saw to see if I can bounce her off without getting hurt.

They love all the fun times they can have with me ...

 

[Weeg]

Momma wants to meet yoo!

 

[chew the fat]

How would this go ...

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day ... thou art more lovely and more temperate ...

[ apologies if by coincidence your name happens to be Summer... ]

 

[Weeg]

How would this go ...

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day ... thou art more lovely and more temperate ...

[ apologies if by coincidence your name happens to be Summer... ]

Momma likes that! Yoo wanna go on a date?