Confessions

[realgrimm]

me and a buddy pissed all over a hooker passed out under the urinals at the bar I worked at...lol

 

[rigor79]

a friend and me used a painting pot (when we where 9 or so) with a sticker on the outside (swimming club) and a gap on the top, ringing doors and asking to pitch in for the club .. free candy and fireworks lol .. :Excited3::ROFL3:

 

[Swamp-Duck]

I once put a tab of acid in my dads whisky bottle, he sat there all night shouting at the wall and my mum hit him with a tray.

 

[Damaged Maven]

I once put a tab of acid in my dads whisky bottle, he sat there all night shouting at the wall and my mum hit him with a tray.

You I like!

 

[Vile_Vixen]

At my old job they used to do a secret Santa thing at Christmas.......I bought a vile of AssKisser Breath Spray wrapped it right nice in Christmas paper and left it in my bosses office.......:LMAO2:

She was so upset by the truth she insisted they investigate.....

They never figured out it was me who left it...

 

[Oliver Shagnasty]

At my old job they used to do a secret Santa thing at Christmas.......I bought a vile of AssKisser Breath Spray wrapped it right nice in Christmas paper and left it in my bosses office.......:LMAO2:

She was so upset by the truth she insisted they investigate.....

They never figured out it was me who left it...

You sly poots!!

 

[Seamajor]

I had sex with this devout catholic women that used to be my book keeper. Just out of the blue. It happened like it was supposed to. She loved sex, and was on the launching pad after 4:30. Another issue needing atonement

 

[rigor79]

during a camp weekend with christian kids before our christening dropping bread crums and itching powder in some dude's bed and other filth ... little gang of funny kids .. sneaking out the window at night talking to girls next room... :)

 

[X]

Once I laughed at a fat lady sweating on the Bus, she wiped it dry only for it to reappear just as fast as she wiped it ...I laughed even harder ..

 

[Damaged Maven]

Once I laughed at a fat lady sweating on the Bus, she wiped it dry only for it to reappear just as fast as she wiped it ...I laughed even harder ..

You don't have to be fat to sweat profusely. Inablility to regulate body temperature sucks, and it usually means you'll die young.
But fat people are a source of amusement and revulsion, regardless....

 

[X]

Also a source of organic root vegetables ...the shit that grows in those folds ....

 

[Jeannie]

i hit a raccoon last night :/

 

[Val Gina]

I watched Barbie, on netflix

 

[Jeannie]

I watched Barbie, on netflix

thats crossing the line lol

 

[Val Gina]

I watched Barbie, on netflix

I am truly ashamed :Blush:

 

[Damaged Maven]

i hit a raccoon last night :/

Ii ate a raccoon last night, with nature's gravy and root vegetables. The carcass was still warm, so it couldn't have been over 30 minutes dead....

 

[Jeannie]

i hit a raccoon last night :/

Ii ate a raccoon last night, with nature's gravy and root vegetables. The carcass was still warm, so it couldn't have been over 30 minutes dead....

if u found it on staten island, ur welcome :)

 

[rigor79]

i was chuckling at an african female who fell asleep in the bus on a hot day, with a round shaped afro american haircut .. she slept for abt 30. minutes and when she woke up .. the right side was nice and round shaped and the left half was flat bcos of the window and sleeping against it, not racist but it was so funny .. reminded me abt movies likes "road trip".

 

[rigor79]

i hit a raccoon last night :/

Ii ate a raccoon last night, with nature's gravy and root vegetables. The carcass was still warm, so it couldn't have been over 30 minutes dead....

if u found it on staten island, ur welcome :)

are those cute dipshits edible? :WaitWhat:

 

[Damaged Maven]

i hit a raccoon last night :/

Ii ate a raccoon last night, with nature's gravy and root vegetables. The carcass was still warm, so it couldn't have been over 30 minutes dead....

if u found it on staten island, ur welcome :)

are those cute dipshits edible? :WaitWhat:

You gotta cook them medium well to kill the possible rabies virus, but yeah. Very lean, tastes like marmot.

How the fuck should I know? The poodle won't even eat it.

 

[Oliver Shagnasty]

Oh the poodle? Is that where you take your advice? If the poodle ate it's own shit would you as well Maven?
You disgusting slut.

 

[SHAMPAIN]

I watched Barbie, on netflix

You deserve whipped with split cane! lolol

 

[Oliver Shagnasty]

I watched Barbie, on netflix

You deserve whipped with split cane! lolol

May I watch?

 

[SHAMPAIN]

I watched Barbie, on netflix

You deserve whipped with split cane! lolol

May I watch?

Of course you can my friend hehe

 

[Damaged Maven]

Oh the poodle? Is that where you take your advice? If the poodle ate it's own shit would you as well Maven?
You disgusting slut.

The Poodle only eats litter box cat shit and field raised Australian wagyu beef, and I suggest you let that marinate awhile before you crank out another.

 

[TheHaze]

i hit a raccoon last night :/

Ii ate a raccoon last night, with nature's gravy and root vegetables. The carcass was still warm, so it couldn't have been over 30 minutes dead....

Did it taste like chicken ? I have eaten just about every kind of meat (except cat,whale or human) including this>>>

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[Jeannie]

i dont like talking behind anyones back so i would like 2 confess i was just saying privately what a stupid, idiotic and useless ass hat stinkyfinger is

 

[Blazor]

during a camp weekend with christian kids before our christening dropping bread crums and itching powder in some dude's bed and other filth ... little gang of funny kids .. sneaking out the window at night talking to girls next room... :)

That reminds me of the days when I use to hypnotize people lol. One of my friends, under hypnosis, I told him anytime anyone mentioned anything about sex, he would scratch his balls (he was a horny fucker). So over the course of 3 hours, we would say anything, like pussy, blowjob, didnt matter, scratch scratch scratch lol. He swore up and down we did something to him like put itching powder on his balls lol. He went to the bathroom twice to check lol. Finally I confessed what I done, which breaks the hypnotic spell lol.

 

[Jeannie]

during a camp weekend with christian kids before our christening dropping bread crums and itching powder in some dude's bed and other filth ... little gang of funny kids .. sneaking out the window at night talking to girls next room... :)

That reminds me of the days when I use to hypnotize people lol. One of my friends, under hypnosis, I told him anytime anyone mentioned anything about sex, he would scratch his balls (he was a horny fucker). So over the course of 3 hours, we would say anything, like pussy, blowjob, didnt matter, scratch scratch scratch lol. He swore up and down we did something to him like put itching powder on his balls lol. He went to the bathroom twice to check lol. Finally I confessed what I done, which breaks the hypnotic spell lol.

plays harmonica, fiddle and is a hypnotist - can i rent u for my next party?

 

[Swamp-Duck]

When my Nan use day to send me out for milk early in the morning, I used to pinch it off other people’s doorsteps and keep the money.