Jokes thread

[Jeannie]

:facepalm:

 

[Dageaux]

You got me.

I guess I'm in trouble now. You better send

 

[Jeannie]

it was so corny lol
ah hoooo!! XD

 

[TheHaze]

Age Discrimination at Car Dealership...


A retired older couple return to a Mercedes dealership where the salesman has just sold the car they were interested in to a beautiful, leggy, busty blonde in a mini skirt and a halter.

"I thought you said you would hold that car till we raised the $155,000 asking price," said the older man. "Yet I just heard you closed the deal for $130,000 to the lovely young lady there. You insisted there could was no way you could discount this model."

"Well, what can I tell you? She had the ready cash and, just look at her, how could I resist?" replied the grinning salesman.

Just then the young woman approached the senior couple and gave the car keys to the old man......

"There you go," she said. "I told you I could get that asshole to lower the price.................

See you later, dad."

 

[realgrimm]

If a blackbird brings black babies and a stork brings white babies,

What bird brings no babies?


VVHighlightVV
Swallow

 

[chew the fat]

I rang 911 the other day because two women were fighting over me.

The operator asks “well, whats the emergency”?

I said “the bloody ugly one is winning”.

 

[Damaged Maven]

Two guys walk into a bar. A third guy walked around it, got a table, and waited for service.

 

[Jeannie]

wheres the rest of it?

 

[Damaged Maven]

The first two guys got up off the floor and joined the third one, who had oordered gin and tonic all around.

 

[Jeannie]

oh
good one -_-

 

[Damaged Maven]

A guy walks into a bar with a duck. Bartender asks the guy "What you want?" The guy says "Ask the duck. He's buying."

 

[X]

wheres the rest of it?

 

[SHAMPAIN]

wheres the rest of it?

You just cannot refrain from sticking your huge nose in can you? I find it hilarious that a part time carpet fitter should call anyone a dunce eh...

 

[chew the fat]

 

[X]

wheres the rest of it?

You just cannot refrain from sticking your huge nose in can you? I find it hilarious that a part time carpet fitter should call anyone a dunce eh...

You post as though I could give a flying fuck what a little rickity internet flea has got to say :LMAO:

 

[Jeannie]

wheres the rest of it?

its called sarcasm u big nose, beady eyed idiot

 

[X]

In Canada we call it DUHHhhhhh

lol Nice try and save though ;)

:LMAO:

 

[SHAMPAIN]

wheres the rest of it?

You just cannot refrain from sticking your huge nose in can you? I find it hilarious that a part time carpet fitter should call anyone a dunce eh...

You post as though I could give a flying fuck what a little rickity internet flea has got to say :LMAO:

You post like “internet flea” offends... At least I don’t have fluid retention in my legs...

 

[X]

Have wut ?? :LMAO::LMAO: I nevered in my life heard anything so stupid ...fuck man your a walnut ....lololol

 

[SHAMPAIN]

In Canada we call it DUHHhhhhh

lol Nice try and save though ;)

:LMAO:

You Canadians stole “eh” from the East coast of Scotland...Facts

 

[Jeannie]

wheres the rest of it?

You just cannot refrain from sticking your huge nose in can you? I find it hilarious that a part time carpet fitter should call anyone a dunce eh...

You post as though I could give a flying fuck what a little rickity internet flea has got to say :LMAO:

You post like “internet flea” offends... At least I don’t have fluid retention in my legs...

LMMFAO

 

[X]

Sure, whatever you say
bro

 

[X]

wheres the rest of it?

You just cannot refrain from sticking your huge nose in can you? I find it hilarious that a part time carpet fitter should call anyone a dunce eh...

You post as though I could give a flying fuck what a little rickity internet flea has got to say :LMAO:

You post like “internet flea” offends... At least I don’t have fluid retention in my legs...

LMMFAO

..Bigger capitals !!!!!!!! ...I might notice MOARRRRRRRRRR LOLOLOLOLOL Gimpity dimpity dumb ass :LMAO::LMAO::LMAO::LMAO::LMAO::LMAO::LMAO:

 

[X]

A guy walks into a bar, stubs his toe

 

[SHAMPAIN]

Postjokes

 

[X]

here's the biggest

 

[Jeannie]

Postjokes

agreed

one day someone asked stinkyfinger if he wanted 2 go jogging and stinky said
'cant - my legs r all most delicious woman I’ve ever laid my eyes on! and swollen from fluid retention :('

:D

 

[SHAMPAIN]

Postjokes

agreed

one day someone asked stinkyfinger if he wanted 2 go jogging and stinky said
'cant - my legs r all most delicious woman I’ve ever laid my eyes on! and swollen from fluid retention :('

:D

You just know he’s searching for it unless he suffers from deep vein Thrombosis

 

[X]

Here's a joke ..2 pathetic idiots 'liking' each others posts for moral support ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa

Thanks for the concern peeps, but I'm sure a more pressing matter is that Jeannie can't get a simple joke and you are an adult that collects 'piders :LMAO::LMAO:

I swear you can't make this shit up lolol

Fluid retention bahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa

 

[X]

Jeannie visited Toronto and on the highway a sign said 'Toronto Left' ..she turned around and went home .. Le Duhhhhhhhhhhhh lolol