USELESS INFORMATION thread

Swamp-Duck

Factory Bastard
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TheHaze

If my dog doesn't like you, I probably won'teither
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Medical Info Women Should Know


Pregnancy, Estrogen, and Women
PREGNANCY Q & A & more!




Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q : I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q : What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.


Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.?
Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

"ESTROGEN ISSUES"
8 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"

1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.
3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
5. You 're using your cell phone to dial up every bumper
sticker that says: "How's my driving".
6. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space."
7. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
8. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.

TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND
10. Cats' facial expressions.
9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.
8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.
7. Fat clothes.
6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and eggshell.
4. Cutting your hair to make it grow.
3. Eyelash curlers.
2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.

AND, the Number One thing only women understand:

1. OTHER WOMEN
 

Damaged Maven

A little older and a little stupider than most.
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That's like a fluffy layer cake. You eat the top layer with all the frosting, then there's another delicious layer underneath.
 

Damaged Maven

A little older and a little stupider than most.
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Imagine if you will a beer with such volatile carbonation that if served below room temperature fizzes half the can's contents upon opening.

Six Point brewery, " The Crisp" pilz.

And the can looks gay.
 

Mr. Whipple

brilliantly insane
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What the hell happened to red pistachios ?
5b9e862e250000320036e624.jpeg

If you have no idea what red pistachios are, you're probably under the age of 30 and think they sound as foreign as
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. Once upon a time, however, pistachios used to be bright red -- not a natural red, but a dyed red that left your hands (and potentially your face) a vivid hue of cherry. But they're not around anymore. So what gives
Pistachios are native to the Middle East and Asia, and up until the 1970s, the United States imported most of its pistachio nuts. Though
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in the mid 1800s, the industry didn't take off in America until an
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was enforced in 1979 due to the Iran hostage crisis. While the ban was lifted in 1981, it was enforced again from 1987 to 2000, and then reinstated by President Obama in 2011 in response to Iran's nuclear program.
Today the United States is the second largest producer of pistachios -- after Iran -- and around
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grown in the United States come from California. The rest of the country's commercial pistachio production occurs in Texas, New Mexico and Arizona.
 

TheHaze

If my dog doesn't like you, I probably won'teither
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Thinking the market for them just drop off and best are green chile favor pistachio - - - - - -

In case any one is wondering where I have been since wed been in the hospital (3 days) for another flare up in my lungs and though this is it but OK for now,so no more weed and haven't had a smoke since 5-1-20 - - - - - - -
 

Q

Dictator of the Bastard Factory
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The oldest pot of honey that is still good to eat was discovered by Howard Carter in 1922, in the tomb of Tutankhamun. It was tested by biologists and found to still be fit for consumption.
 
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