The Poetry Thread

chew the fat

Fluent In Sarcasm
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The Bastard Factory Has Me ...
stunned,
startled,
aghast,
taken aback,
stupefied,
confused,
shocked,
rattled,
paralysed,
dazed,
bewildered,
mixed up,
surprised,
dumbfounded,
nonplussed,
flabbergasted,
astounded,
amazed,
confounded,
astonished,
overwhelmed,
horrified,
numbed,
speechless, and perplexed.
 

chew the fat

Fluent In Sarcasm
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The Penis Poem

My nookie days are over, my pilot light is out,
What used to be my sex appeal is now my water spout!
Time was when, on its own, from my trousers it would spring,
But now it's just a full time job to find the fuckin thing!
It used to be embarrassing the way it would behave,
For every single morning it would stand & watch me shave!
Now, as old age approaches, it sure gives me the blues,
To see it hang its little head and watch me tie my shoes!
 

chew the fat

Fluent In Sarcasm
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[] whizz []

When you're in the bog
To see a man about a dog
And you do a piss
And you miss
Shake your schlong in the air
Shake it here and shake there
Shake it up
Shake it down
Shake it all around
And don't be a clown
Put the toilet seat back down ...
 

UncleDiLF

Let's meAT...hehe!!!
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MeNs tOiLEts
**UncleDiLF’s Filthy SCAT Quest**
Out in the woods, with a grin so sly,
UncleDiLF wandered, eyes to the sky.
“Where’s the scat? The filth, the grime?
I’ll find it all—it's discovery time!”

A pile appeared, a steaming mound,
“Behold!” he cried, “The treasure I’ve found!”
“Berries? Bugs? Or something more?”
He poked it once—then twice, for sure.

Filthier still, he took a sniff,
“Oh, nature’s perfume!” said UncleDiLF.
But a breeze blew hard; his triumph fell,
As SCAT's rich aroma became his hell.

So here’s the tale, as gross as it gets,
Of SCAT, of filth, and zero regrets.
UncleDiLF, with his filthy flair,
Proved some adventures are best left *there*.
 

chew the fat

Fluent In Sarcasm
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Trump lacks certain []'NO'[] qualities ...

no wit,
no class,+
no grace,+
no honor,+
no charm,+
no warmth,+
no wisdom,+
no subtlety,+
no humility,+
no coolness,+
no credibility,+
no sensitivity,+
no compassion ...



aq7QvE8.gif
 

Fredricka

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Necrophilijack

My name is Jack,
Im a necrophiliac
I shag dead men and I shag dead women
I get frustrated
when they're cremated
Cuz try as I must i can't shag dust
My name is Sean
And I'm into gay porn
I see a bum and I can't help but cum
I'm just like jack im a necrophiliac
I shag dead men and I shag dead women
I get frustrated
when they're cremated
Cuz try as I must I can't shag dust
My name is Russ,
And I'm incestuous
I shag my mother and I bugger my brother
I'm just like Sean, I'm into gay porn
I see a bum and I can't help but cum
I'm just like jack,
I'm a necrophiliac
I shag dead men and I shag dead women
I get frustrated
when they're cremated
Cuz try as I must I cant shag dust

Anon
 

Admin.

President Trump is a Pedophile
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PNW Regional Antifa V.P.
I was a bum in San Francisco
but once managed to go to a symphony concert along with the well-dressed people

and the music was good
but something about the audience was not
and something about the orchestra and the conductor was not,
although the building was fine and the acoustics perfect
I preferred to listen to the music alone on my radio

and afterwards I did go back to my room and I turned on the radio
but then there was a pounding on the wall:
"SHUT THAT GOD-DAM*ED THING OFF!"
there was a soldier in the next room living with his wife

and he would soon be going over there to protect me from H*tler
so I snapped the radio off and then heard his wife say, "you shouldn't have done that."
and the soldier said, "F*CK THAT GUY!"
which I thought was a very nice thing for him to tell his wife to do.
of course, she never did.

anyhow, 
I never went to another live concert
and that night I listened to the radio very quietly,
my ear pressed to the speaker.

war has its price
and peace never lasts
and millions of young men everywhere would die

and as I listened to the classical music I heard them making love,
desperately and mournfully,
through Shostakovich, Brahms, Mozart,
through crescendo and climax,

and through the shared wall of our darkness.

~ Charles Bukowski
 

Holy Holliday !

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The Big Tent

The Stolen Child​


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1865 – 1939

Where dips the rocky highland
Of Sleuth Wood in the lake,
There lies a leafy island
Where flapping herons wake
The drowsy water rats;
There we've hid our faery vats,
Full of berrys
And of reddest stolen cherries.
Come away, O human child!
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand.
Where the wave of moonlight glosses
The dim gray sands with light,
Far off by furthest Rosses
We foot it all the night,
Weaving olden dances
Mingling hands and mingling glances
Till the moon has taken flight;
To and fro we leap
And chase the frothy bubbles,
While the world is full of troubles
And anxious in its sleep.
Come away, O human child!
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand.
Where the wandering water gushes
From the hills above Glen-Car,
In pools among the rushes
That scarce could bathe a star,
We seek for slumbering trout
And whispering in their ears
Give them unquiet dreams;
Leaning softly out
From ferns that drop their tears
Over the young streams.
Come away, O human child!
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand.
Away with us he's going,
The solemn-eyed:
He'll hear no more the lowing
Of the calves on the warm hillside
Or the kettle on the hob
Sing peace into his breast,
Or see the brown mice bob
Round and round the oatmeal chest.
For he comes, the human child,
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world's more full of weeping than he can understand.
 

Holy Holliday !

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The Big Tent
Apeman - Ray Davies

I think I'm sophisticated
'Cause I'm living my life
Like a good homo sapiens
But all around me
Everybody's multiplying
And they're walking round like flies, man
So I'm no better than the animals
Sitting in the cages in the zoo, man
'Cause compared to the flowers
And the birds and the trees
I am an apeman
I think I'm so educated
And I'm so civilized
'Cause I'm a strict vegetarian
And with the over population
And inflation and starvation
And the crazy politicians
I don't feel safe in this world no more
I don't want to die in a nuclear war
I want to sail away to a distant shore
And make like an apeman
I'm an apeman
I'm an ape, apeman
Oh, I'm an apeman
I'm a king-kong man
I'm a voodoo man
Oh, I'm an apeman
'Cause compared to the sun that sits in the sky
Compared to the clouds as they roll by
Compared to the bugs and the spiders and flies
I am an apeman
Laa la la la la la la
In man's evolution
He's created the city
And the motor traffic rumble
But give me half a chance
And I'd be taking off my clothes
And living in the jungle
'Cause the only time that I feel at ease
Is swinging up and down in a coconut tree
Oh what a life of luxury
To be like an apeman
I'm an apeman
I'm an ape, apeman
Oh, I'm an apeman
I'm a king-kong man
I'm a voodoo man
Oh, I'm an apeman
I look out the window
But I can't see the sky
The air pollution is a-fogging up my eyes
I want to get out of this city alive
And make like an apeman
La la la la la la la
Come on and love me
Be my apeman girl
And we'd be so happy
In my apeman world
I'm an apeman
I'm an ape, apeman
Oh, I'm an apeman
I'm a king-kong man
I'm a voodoo man
Oh, I'm an apeman
I'll be your Tarzan and you'll be my Jane
I'll keep you warm and you'll keep me sane
We'll sit in the trees and eat bananas all day
Just like an apeman
I'm an apeman
I'm an ape, apeman
Oh, I'm an apeman
I'm a king-kong man
I'm a voodoo man
Oh, I'm an apeman
I don't feel safe in this world no more
I don't want to die in a nuclear war
I want to sail away to a distant shore
And make like an apeman
La la la la la la la