The Poetry Thread

chew the fat

Fluent In Sarcasm
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There was a young lady named Lily

Who tried very hard not to be silly

But when she sang in the shower

Her little voice just had no power

And she sounded like Milli Vanilli ... :OhGawd:
 

chew the fat

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I was born in Australia ...

With male genitalia ...

I'm not going to change ...

Or even rearrange ... [ normal daily adjustments exempt ]

But my brain turned out to be a failure ... :OhGawd:

:Triggered:
 

chew the fat

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I hear the voices in my head

I don't understand what they said

I can't think of any more rhymes

And that's been a sign of these times

That this could be the end of this thread ...


But you know I never give in

Cause that would be a very big sin

Have I gone wrong

And taken way too long

No, and please don't put this one in the bin ... :OhGawd:
 

chew the fat

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I once met this girl her name was Sharona

She was pretty and hot and gave me a boner

I thought why not come up with a pickup line

Something quite neat that would rhyme

I racked through my brain to do my best

All I could think of was her lovely delicious chest

So I asked her what do think of this stupid little ditty

She said no chance and you aren't touching my titty ... :Disagree:
 

Omnipotent

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HEAD spinning, poems winning,

CHEW the fat still grinning,

But everyone knows

He's after the hoes

And on his mind is a, sinning...

No hero is he,

He's on his knees,

The forum pleas,

Stop the prose!!!!

caskur comes in with a pair of scissors,

Show me your hairy back, Chew the Fat,

She clips him bare with her incisors and shivers,

Then lassoed his furless withers,

Now try and catch the hoes, Bard

And quit being a big tard...;)


Copyright caskur!~
 

chew the fat

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Elon Musk has sent me a tweet

I thought that was pretty neat

He asked me for my advice

About how to be very nice

And not put all the twitter users on delete ... :Disagree:
 

chew the fat

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caskur is our YouTube queen

One of the best I've ever seen

She shoots her still shots

In very large lots

And the videos look nice and clean ...:Awesome:
 
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chew the fat

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The Bastard Factory is my home

At least I'm here and not alone

Some funny people here of wit

With some who really do get it

And when I post, I'm right here in their zone ... :GiggleBitch:
 
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Omnipotent

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Admin clue,

Admin flu,

Give the old bastard another tissue,

"You got covid," Dove said,

As she belted him over the head,

Over and over until he was dead.

haha!!!
 
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Omnipotent

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When Garraty_47 went to pussy heaven,

Kevin was surprised,

But when Reaper went in deeper,

Dovey emphasized,

Admin's tiny peepeehole wasn't immunized,

And for all the gratuitous folly,

It was strongly ill-advised

copyright - caskur ... and the one before as well.
 

chew the fat

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[] the simple things in life []


round and round and round we go

where we end up we will never know

upside down and inside out

it's a crazy mixed up world, no doubt


north or south or east and west

this has been a very hard test

how about we go underground

and just sit back and bum around


there's no relaxing to relieve the stress

that's what got us in this mess

have a drink and take a pill

sit back now and chill ...


now we are free to love

it's a great emotion, kind of

no more hurt no more pain

we can start all over again

this will never be the end

if you will just be my friend ...
 
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Garraty_47

Garraty_47

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Unnamed

We are the first, we are the last
The only ones to walk our paths
For a time they parallel-
For how far is hard to tell
No traffic lights to give direction
Move and turn at our discretion
For a time we parallel-
'Why' is just not ours to tell
Two different engines each for we
To push and pull alternately
Yin and Yang, the Gemini
Eternal versions of you and I
We are finite and that is well
It makes me glad we paralleled.
 

Aylana

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Unnamed

We are the first, we are the last
The only ones to walk our paths
For a time they parallel-
For how far is hard to tell
No traffic lights to give direction
Move and turn at our discretion
For a time we parallel-
'Why' is just not ours to tell
Two different engines each for we
To push and pull alternately
Yin and Yang, the Gemini
Eternal versions of you and I
We are finite and that is well
It makes me glad we paralleled.

Gary, I'm not sure why you'd post half-decent poem on Bastard Factory, where only at most 10 people might read it...instead, you should join a poetry website and share it there.
 
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Garraty_47

Garraty_47

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Gary, I'm not sure why you'd post half-decent poem on Bastard Factory, where only at most 10 people might read it...instead, you should join a poetry website and share it there.

People on poetry forums see junk like that and better all the time. A forum with a relatively smaller viewership and no tradition of showcasing poetry is exactly the kind of platform poetry should visit.

Don't be a fuckin' snob.
 

chew the fat

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[] Madam Rue [] [] subject to any changes []

I took my troubles down to Madam Rue...
She's the gypsy that's been sniffing glue...
She has her diggs in the district of SoHo...
So I gave her a call on my phone,I said,''Hey Rue . Yo''...

Can you help with this problem real quick...
I have fallen in love with this really sweet, cute chick...
But she has rough edges that need a quick fix...
Madam Rue can fix this with your magical mix...

Madam Rue said, give me some time ...
I'll mix you up some Alcoholic Love Wine ...
This will work out pretty fine...
But chicks know all about this...
So just fill her up on regular P. I. S. S ...
Cheap Wine is the preferred brew...
Madam Rue said, "this is all I can do"...

Well I said Madam Rue you are so great...
The best there is, would you be my mate...
Madam Rue said NO I need my power intact...
I have to move on to other things...that's a fact...

So I gave my chick a bottle of this Alcoholic Love Wine...
She said, "well 'chew' it's about fucking time...
I haven't had any since Two Thousand And Nine...
It's pretty damn good... ''I feel sublime''...
But then the cute chick went crazy mad...
It really was so very very sad...
She went and broke the bottle of the Alcoholic Love Wine...
Now she's stuffed it up real big this time...
So 'chew the fat' sat down and had a big cry...
And now it's time to say bye bye...
I just can't have a win ... I don't why ...

['bye bye]['bye bye]
 

chew the fat

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[] chew the fat land []

all is cool in chew the fat land...
he lives his life very very bland...
don't even stress about his brain...
just jump aboard the ctf fun train...

wind him up and pull him through...
give him plenty, the best you can do...
pick him up and then knock him down...
because in the end he's just a regular clown...

make him jump through the hoops...
and hope he falls down hard...woops...
drag him round by the short and curls'
and hope he gives in, gives up, and hurls.

then when he's done, lock him away...
get the key and throw it to hell...okay...
he's just a no good stupid reckless misfit...
and let's not put up with any more of his shit ...
 

Biggie Smiles

I make libturds berry angry. I do!!!
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this one is for all the revolting transvermin filth out there.

I don't know what else to think about a man wearing a Dress
Other than to say his mind is a mess that is under Duress
A dress, some heels and even a Bra.
As normal people stare in disbelief thinking "oh hell Nah"
This person is sick and deviant and highly Perverse
As they strut on bye with clownshoes corset and color coded Purse
have your children cover close their eyes cover their ears and Hum
As Shrek in a sun blouse lumbers on by singing "fe Fi Fo Fum"
 

Blandscape

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When life is measured in a single fault,
Where lies are spread without assault,
When men are measured by the word,
And mistaken for an inglorious worth.

When hate can only interject,
Where hope dares offer mere circumspect,
When Risk arrives to claim its worth,
And discovers nothing but its own after-birth.

We have what our history simply narrated,
We learn to hate what we all once fated,
We need no measure to measure our worth,
In the smoldering cauldron of that mirth.

We laugh at what we now become,
As our empathy is drained in a bloodless cull,
Where expectation no longer resides,
In the decadent decay of our own grave strife.