Hi, I'm new... duh!

[Ben Dover]

Of course I'm new I'm writing an introduction in the introduction branch. And what to say in this introduction? What would you like to read? Fat unemployed ex truck driver or hot super model? The choice is yours...

 

[Neil B. Formi]

Let's split the difference and say that you're a fat hot ex super truck.

 

[Ben Dover]

Let's split the difference and say that you're a fat hot ex super truck.

Done! Hi, I'm Hugo and I'm an advanced form of ex super truck who can interact with humans so be careful cas I might steal your girlfriend. So what do you fuckwits get up to here anyway?

 

[Neil B. Formi]

...I might steal your girlfriend.

That'd be a neat trick. If you manage to pull it off, let me know who she was. And best of luck to you.

So what do you fuckwits get up to here anyway?

We usually 'yell' (metaphorically) at each other about politics. When we're not flaming each other, we occasionally team up to flame the following posters:

-X
-Weeg
-The Prowler
-Adam Hitler
-Flynn
-Your cousin Trent (wait, wrong year, he doesn't post here yet, forget I mentioned him.)

Also, beware of Meltdown, there's a colony of feral cats down there. Also also: Admin is a menstrual scab kebab. (That rhyme was not intentional; don't flip out and go on a stabbing spree with a rubber glove. Not least of all because that would be completely ineffective.)

 

[Ben Dover]

Oh, so its pretty tame then. Ill spice it up, don't you worry!

 

[Neil B. Formi]

-X
-Weeg
-The Prowler
-Adam Hitler
-Flynn

I just realized that I should probably explain why everyone flames the above posters. I'll keep it concise.

X: Only knows the words, 'cock' and 'faggot'. Basically, he's like a parakeet from San Francisco.
Weeg: Maintains the persona of a 'special needs' toddler; is actually a 'special needs' geriatric. Also: Shades of Norman Bates. Also also: His momma is a hoor.
The Prowler: Pretends to own an 'arctic white C8 C0rve77e'. (Pardon the leetspeak, there's a word filter on the name of that vehicle because of him.) Actually drives a 1973 AMC Shitbox. Has, on at least one occasion he's admitted to, French kissed his dog.
Adam Hitler: Known to perform fellatio on doorknobs. Pretends to be a neo-Nazi; his worst offense against decency, however, is that he is deliberately, and with malice aforethought, British. Simply unforgivable.
Flynn: Pretends to be a woman; is, in point of fact, a shambling eldritch thing composed entirely of uncooked Vienna sausages all mashed together into an amorphous mass of horror.

 

[Ben Dover]

So does pretending to be a chick get some advantage here cas Ill be whatever you want me to be baby.

 

[Neil B. Formi]

So does pretending to be a chick get some advantage here cas Ill be whatever you want me to be baby.

No, not really; certainly not from me, at any rate. (I believe in egalitarianism when it comes to being a caustic asshole.)

 

[Fredricka]

Having fun chatting up flynn Neil?

 

[Fredricka]

Oh, so its pretty tame then. Ill spice it up, don't you worry!

Promises to spice things up......chats about supermarket checkouts

 

[Ben Dover]

Promises to spice things up......chats about supermarket checkouts

Thats where I buy my curry powder.

 

[Jack]

Welcome Ben.

 

[Ben Dover]

Welcome Ben.

Thank you. Its truly an honor to be here.

 

[Jack]

Thank you. Its truly an honor to be here.

How did you stumble upon us?

 

[Ben Dover]

How did you stumble upon us?

I found you in my spam folder.

 

[AnnaConda]

How did you stumble upon us?

He forgot the password to his other 500 alts?

 

[Ben Dover]

He forgot the password to his other 500 alts?

Autosave fucked up.

 

[Neil B. Formi]

Thank you. Its truly an honor to be here.

Give it time.

 

[Ben Dover]

Give it time.

I regret it already and have already called my mum to come and pick me up.

 

[Neil B. Formi]

I regret it already and have already called my mum to come and pick me up.

Let's hope she remembers to bring the appropriate... gratuity. We don't board and groom strays for free, you know.

 

[Ben Dover]

Let's hope she remembers to bring the appropriate... gratuity. We don't board and groom strays for free, you know.

Yea yea she will suck your dicks.

 

[Neil B. Formi]

Yea yea she will suck your dicks.

Well, there's no need to go making threats...

 

[The New Holliday]

Give it time.

Neil, would you please escort Ben to the Retard Lounge? You know the way. Have a nice sit-down stay.

 

[Ben Dover]

Neil, would you please escort Ben to the Retard Lounge? You know the way. Have a nice sit-down stay.

I was in there before but you told me to leave. You said you were having special alone time.

 

[The New Holliday]

I was in there before but you told me to leave. You said you were having special alone time.

The NO YOU! is an art form, Benji.
.You, sir and/or madam, are no artist.

 

[Ben Dover]

The NO YOU! is an art form, Benji.
.You, sir and/or madam, are no artist.

Am too, you just don't have artistic eyes you heathen!

 

[The New Holliday]

@theMods:
.Who is checking IDs at the door?
No way Ben is over 12.
. Do better, please.

 

[Admin.]

@theMods:
.Who is checking IDs at the door?
No way Ben is over 12.
. Do better, please.

Absolutely, we don’t need another incident like that last one.

 

[The New Holliday]

Absolutely, we don’t need another incident like that last one.

THAT...nearly took the board down for good and all.

 

[Admin.]

THAT...nearly took the board down for good and all.

I’m still surprised no charges were filed.